Got Bed Bugs? Bedbugger Forums » Psychological and Health problems caused by bed bugs (besides bites)

Wife is struggling with it all

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  1. paulfoel

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    Posted 4 months ago
    Sat Jan 12 2019 5:41:08
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    Admitted the other day she just wanted to burn the whole house down and start again. And that the idea had crossed her mind.

    Very worrying of course. We've had a pro in and it looks like they have gone. BUT, she still says she gets the occasional bite. We've got passive monitors in the bedrooms and nothing and no other signs. Put DE down as well - more to keep her happy that this was an extra thing to be honest.

    BUT we found some very similar looking bugs in the en suite bathroom. I know people on this forum have said they wont be in the en suite but we've found 3 now. Hoping they are bat bugs NOT beg bugs (David on this forum is kindly id for us). But thats freaked her even more.

    Know its common for people to think they've got bites still. Anyone else get issues or partner whos the same? I can see how hard it is for some people.

    My wifes the type to freak first without looking at the evidence.

  2. SalsaVince

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    Posted 4 months ago
    Sat Jan 12 2019 17:39:27
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    Paul,
    I think your saga has been going on for a couple of months now? It does get old doesn't it? Your wife's sentiments sound similar to most on here that are currently experiencing bugs, especially when it's taking longer than they may have anticipated to be done with it. I believe my mom said the exact same words. I'm sure she wouldn't actually do that, well almost sure, but they are just a way of venting frustration.
    And yes, after going through the experience, it's natural to be hypersensitive to marks and irritations on the skin and assume the worst but I wouldn't completely dismiss her bites that she says she still gets occasionally. Just be understanding and encouraging. All you have to go on is the monitors and visual inspections to measure your success and it sounds like you're getting close to the finish line. That is odd with the location of those remaining bugs but hopefully you get them under control too. In the mean time, be sure to keep doing things that you enjoy together that take your minds off of bed bugs for a while. Hang in there.

    "If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles."
    Not an expert. Just a survivor who's still learning.
    Vince
  3. paulfoel

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    Posted 4 months ago
    Sun Jan 13 2019 11:54:37
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    SalsaVince - 18 hours ago  » 
    Paul,
    I think your saga has been going on for a couple of months now? It does get old doesn't it? Your wife's sentiments sound similar to most on here that are currently experiencing bugs, especially when it's taking longer than they may have anticipated to be done with it. I believe my mom said the exact same words. I'm sure she wouldn't actually do that, well almost sure, but they are just a way of venting frustration.
    And yes, after going through the experience, it's natural to be hypersensitive to marks and irritations on the skin and assume the worst but I wouldn't completely dismiss her bites that she says she still gets occasionally. Just be understanding and encouraging. All you have to go on is the monitors and visual inspections to measure your success and it sounds like you're getting close to the finish line. That is odd with the location of those remaining bugs but hopefully you get them under control too. In the mean time, be sure to keep doing things that you enjoy together that take your minds off of bed bugs for a while. Hang in there.

    Cheers. I guess a lot of it is initial shock and horror, then you get someone in and think its sorted. Then you see more.

    But like you say, nothing in the traps, Im sure we're almost there to be honest....

  4. paulfoel

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    Posted 4 months ago
    Fri Jan 18 2019 15:13:01
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    paulfoel - 5 days ago  » 

    SalsaVince - 18 hours ago  » 
    Paul,
    I think your saga has been going on for a couple of months now? It does get old doesn't it? Your wife's sentiments sound similar to most on here that are currently experiencing bugs, especially when it's taking longer than they may have anticipated to be done with it. I believe my mom said the exact same words. I'm sure she wouldn't actually do that, well almost sure, but they are just a way of venting frustration.
    And yes, after going through the experience, it's natural to be hypersensitive to marks and irritations on the skin and assume the worst but I wouldn't completely dismiss her bites that she says she still gets occasionally. Just be understanding and encouraging. All you have to go on is the monitors and visual inspections to measure your success and it sounds like you're getting close to the finish line. That is odd with the location of those remaining bugs but hopefully you get them under control too. In the mean time, be sure to keep doing things that you enjoy together that take your minds off of bed bugs for a while. Hang in there.

    Cheers. I guess a lot of it is initial shock and horror, then you get someone in and think its sorted. Then you see more.
    But like you say, nothing in the traps, Im sure we're almost there to be honest....

    Alas, one live one in the bed in the daytime has freaked her out again....

    Wondering if this is normal to find a few stragglers? What can I say to her?

    Of course, her fear now is that these 2/3 will turn into hundreds again..... :-(((

  5. Solo Geo

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    Posted 3 months ago
    Mon Jan 28 2019 16:09:46
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    As a current member of the anxiety club cause by Bed Bugs I can say only this. Continue to do your daily checks for the pests. As more and more days go bye with no sighting the easy things will get. I know finding live ones running around causes an emotional back slide, but keeping proactive (at least for my wife and I) make us feel as we are making progress. I would say you and your wife are near the finish line, as my family and I are mid war trying to regain our territory for the invading force. Positive reinforcement is key.

  6. paulfoel

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    Posted 3 months ago
    Tue Jan 29 2019 6:05:54
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    Solo Geo - 13 hours ago  » 
    As a current member of the anxiety club cause by Bed Bugs I can say only this. Continue to do your daily checks for the pests. As more and more days go bye with no sighting the easy things will get. I know finding live ones running around causes an emotional back slide, but keeping proactive (at least for my wife and I) make us feel as we are making progress. I would say you and your wife are near the finish line, as my family and I are mid war trying to regain our territory for the invading force. Positive reinforcement is key.

    Yes I think we're near the finish line. Its just disconcerting when you think the issue is sorted and you find another live one.

    Im a bit more practical in my approach - wife just panics and wants to throw everything out. Its a battle to get here to see sense before she puts the entire contents of our house in the bin!

    She admitted at one point that she wanted to burn the house down and claim off the insurance. I guess shes not the only one who gets this bad.

  7. paulfoel

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    Posted 2 months ago
    Tue Mar 12 2019 8:59:33
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    Yes as per my other post, wife is doing my head in now.

    Shes convinced shes still getting bitten. I think its cat fleas. Nothing in monitors for weeks or no other signs.

    There was a small stain on a sheet but it looks like an old one. Found they stain and dont wash out too well. One stain is all we've found thats it.

  8. bed-bugscouk

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    Posted 2 months ago
    Tue Mar 12 2019 10:37:11
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    Post a pic of it and I should be able to give feedback if it’s in focus.

    The hard part is to understand that digging in or getting frustrated only reinforces the anxiety block that’s not helping her to see the detail she needs to be more accurate.

    There is a very good reason why I have two therapists working with me and why one is male and the other female. Not everyone deals with this in the same way and sometimes people are inadvertently unhelpful to each other.

    David

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  9. paulfoel

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    Posted 2 months ago
    Mon Mar 18 2019 9:38:17
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    bed-bugscouk - 5 days ago  » 
    Post a pic of it and I should be able to give feedback if it’s in focus.
    The hard part is to understand that digging in or getting frustrated only reinforces the anxiety block that’s not helping her to see the detail she needs to be more accurate.
    There is a very good reason why I have two therapists working with me and why one is male and the other female. Not everyone deals with this in the same way and sometimes people are inadvertently unhelpful to each other.
    David

    She'd washed the sheets before I got to it so can't get a picture. No more incidents though.

    I did mention that I'd been in touch with you so shes a little happier. Until next time!

    Personally, I think they're finally gone now.

    (Can't wait until we go on holidays - this is where we suspect we picked up last time - shes going to be a nightmare!)


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