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Still feeling neurotic and ridiculous!

(5 posts)
  1. buggedout16

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    Posted 9 years ago
    Fri Jul 16 2010 11:40:12
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    Hey!

    So it's been 3 and a half months since I started the moving process out of my old apartment and about 3 weeks since I finished it (I know, long time but I was doing it all myself.) For most of the past 2 months or longer I'd been staying/sleeping here at the new apartment pretty much exclusively, only going to the old apartment to pack, clean, trash stuff (won't bore you with the whole long process but you can read in earlier threads [if you wanted, haha] the process I did this in order to avoid transporting BBs). I did spend a few nights there out of necessity and I didn't see any sign of the BBs throughout this time, which of course I know could mean nothing. But if they were still there after this long I think there would have been signs, considering how bare the place was; also, they would have had to be hungry, since I was only there a couple nights at a time for 2-3 or more weeks at a time. I did a thorough decontamination process every time I left the old place and came back here. I haven't seen any real signs of BBs since I moved in here, other than paranoid worrying about things that turned out to be nothing (see my most recent posts/threads.)

    But I'm still afraid to buy much furniture. I was sleeping on an air mattress until I woke up to a dead spider by my face; since then I've been sleeping on my loveseat (which I have a passive monitor on). It's not the most comfortable place to sleep but I'm afraid to buy a bed or much other furniture. I don't know how I managed to buy the loveseat/chair (of course new).

    I warn family members to be careful shopping and traveling, and not to buy used furniture (whether they listen or not who knows.)

    I'm still keeping my laundry in ziplocs and drying an hour past dry, and don't wear clothes outside that have been in my apartment, as well as vice versa. I also still keep my purse and all my shoes in ziplocs when inside the apartment.

    I am afraid to visit one of my sisters, who over a year ago had to help eradicate a BB infestation in a camp dorm where she works. She never had any signs of the BBs in her home (she says) and they have never had any further BB problem in that dorm either; and yet I still keep putting off seeing her, and when I do go (ever since I heard that they had had the problem), I never sit down unless we are outside and I'm always looking around her apartment for any signs. I do the same type of "inspecting" when I visit my parents' house as well, or anywhere I stay, really. If I bring anything on any kind of visit to family's homes or on an overnight trip anywhere, it goes in a ziploc bag as soon as I get in the car, and gets treated in the dryer or packtite; and I try to shower and change immediately before I leave those places. (I don't visit often as I don't live very close to them.)

    I've seen a couple of house centipedes since I moved in here, and every time I'm sure that means I must have BBs; never mind that I live farther out in a more woodsy area now and have seen other small insects in the apartment occasionally that could easily be prey for them.

    What's wrong with me?? I'm sick of being such a neurotic paranoid freak, and yet at the same time, in many ways, I'm sure if I relax these "protocols" I'll get re-infested or re-infest somewhere else. I mean, in some ways that could be true, since I work in a hospital; and my sister works at a camp; and another sibling has a very transient lifestyle (though never stays with me, and actually hardly ever stays with my parents either!!). But in other ways I'm being ridiculous, seeing as this area of the country does not have near the level of the problem that other areas do. But at the same time- I know that BBs are a growing problem all around the country now.

    I'm sorry. I know this is way, way long and ridiculous. I know you all have reassured me on many of these points MANY MANY times. I guess I just needed to vent and perhaps remind myself of the rationality, or lack thereof, behind my thoughts/actions. I know that at this point, I should be more of a reassuring voice on here rather than a whiny voice, and hopefully someday that can be true. I'm really sorry to bother you all yet again.

  2. devil_youknow

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    Posted 9 years ago
    Fri Jul 16 2010 12:52:43
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    Nope, you're being smart. I'm free of bugs and still living like I have them (just in case). I was worried about picking a penny off the ground the other day. Little things like that. It will go away I'm sure, but right now it's like "Once bitten, twice shy?"

  3. buggedout16

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    Posted 9 years ago
    Tue Jul 20 2010 12:42:24
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    Thanks for the support/reassurance, devil_youknow. Sorry I have not been able to reply until today.

    I think that part of it is normal reaction. But part of it is a little excessive I suppose, and I need to calm down.

    For example, I was very stupid and despite getting wonderful info on how to completely safely decontaminate a Packtite, I ended up getting rid of mine from the old apartment, and then of course found that they are now on backorder for quite awhile. So I have a new one on order, but that is $300 spent that didn't need to be spent, if I had just stopped and thought and not been so anxious and ridiculous. And now I won't even have one for probably a few more weeks, which makes me even more anxious, but it is my fault!!

    In addition, I sort-of think it might be good for me to "talk to someone" as they say about all this, but at the same time every time I think about doing that, I think about the fact that I could very easily pick up the buggers at that doctors office or something. Very silly!!

    Do you see how ridciulous and neurotic I am!!

  4. Ratorja

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    Posted 9 years ago
    Tue Jul 20 2010 12:47:58
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    House centipedes love spiders as well, and since you met a spider a bit too intimately, it's entirely possible that's why they're there.

  5. buggedout16

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    Posted 9 years ago
    Tue Jul 20 2010 13:12:50
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    Hmm, I didn't think about that Ratorja... Good point, thanks!!!


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