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PLEASE HELP ME!!!

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  1. SleeplessInOhio1

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    Posted 1 year ago
    Thu Mar 29 2018 9:43:46
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    PLEASE HEAR ME OUT.

    I NEED TO TALK TO SOMEONE WHO GETS IT! MY BOYFRIEND DOES NOT GET WELTS, AND DOES NOT EVEN NOTICE THE BED BUGS. HE SLEEPS SOUNDLY AND HE THINKS I AM OVER-REACTING.

    I found this forum last night at 3 AM after waking up to the stinging, pinching bite of a bedbug that had crawled up my pant leg and was sucking blood from my lower leg. I slowly snuck in on the vampire-insect to catch it and pick it off. I drowned it in 91% rubbing alcohol to kill it, and flushed its corpse down the toilet.

    BED BUG BITES DO WAKE ME UP FROM A SOUND SLEEP, my 10 year old son is also getting bit and getting welts, but he is able to continue to sleep through it.

    I already have anxiety, depression and post traumatic stress symptoms from a traumatic event 10 years ago, so I am HYPER-AWARE of my surroundings. I have a hypersensitive nervous system. I notice everything! I honestly wish I could sleep soundly and just wake up with welts, having not to see them crawling and feeding, but they wake me up once an hour if they get to bite freely - I HAVE TIMED IT!

    This is the THIRD night THIS WEEK I have woken up to a live adult bed bug crawling on my body. The other 2 times, I was sleeping in my bedroom on an AIR MATTRESS, after throwing my bed out. When I was in my bedroom, I was wearing a jacket with the hood tied close and snug to my face, long pants, long socks, and rubber dish washing gloves to protect myself. So, the other 2 bugs were just running around my back on top of my jacket trying to find a feeding spot. I looked in the mirror two different nights because I had to get up to pee, and saw them crawling along my shoulder/back area. They move quickly. I killed both of them in by drowning them in a 1/2 teaspoon of 91% rubbing alcohol.

    By the way, if ANY skin is exposed, they will find it and feed on it. Even wearing my makeshift armor of clothing and gloves, the bedbugs still bit my face, and crawled in my neck area to bite me, which woke me up. Being bit on the middle of the neck under my face are the worse spots for welts. The welts are huge and the swelling is terrible when they bite me there.

    Key Points:

    1. I CANNOT AFFORD TO MOVE RIGHT NOW.

    When I lost my job, my family was put on a rental assistance program where the State pays my rent until I find a new job. This program is to help our town prevent homelessness. I already feel ashamed that I am receiving assistance, because I know a lot of people judge that. But, I'm grateful for it. I do realize that I cannot take ANYTHING with me when I move or I'll just take the bugs with me, too. And I do not have many possessions anyway. I am willing to start over from scratch, honestly, I don't have much to lose because I don't have much to begin with.

    However, I don't have enough money to pay my own security deposit on a new place. I don't have enough money to pay a deposit to get water turned on, to get other utilities turned on, and I don't have enough income to pay the monthly bills if I did move to a new place.

    I want to move so badly, but I can't do so right now for financial reasons.

    2. I HAVE LITTLE TO NO INCOME.

    I moved into this apartment building a year ago. I chose this apartment because utilities are included in the rent, and at the time, I had NO INCOME. It seemed like the wisest choice. This place keeps basic living needs met: roof over our heads, power, water, trash collection, heat expenses are all included in the rent, and the rent is paid for. You absolutely NEED to have some kind of home, and address, while you're searching for a job. This is part of preventing homelessness. I have applied to 3 jobs per week for the past 2 years. Nobody calls me for an interview. I held a temporary position from October to November, but the position ended and the search is still on for employment. My boyfriend had 2 interviews, but did not get hired. We are both looking.

    3 months ago, I started receiving child support for my son. It is not very much, the most I get is $100 per month, fingers crossed that the other parent doesn't lose their job and I would lose this modest source of income along with it. This only stretches so far. I decided to get the bare minimum of Internet Services so that I could apply to more jobs more often right from home.

    I do not have a car. We rely on using a small shuttle-bus service for Public Transportation to get places. Which compounds the difficulty in trying to find a job, because I can only apply to jobs along the bus route or within walking distance, and we are a small city with few job openings. I have to pay to ride the bus, so I cannot even ride the bus often.

    3. NO WASHER/DRYER ACCESS!!!!

    These apartments do not even have laundry hookups in the basement. The laundromat business is not along the bus route and is not within walking distance. I have been doing one basket of laundry per week at my parent's house. I am careful - I bring the basket through the basement, and keep clothes in a trash bag during transport.

    My relatives, mother, father, sister, do not want to give me any rides to places. They think that I'm 35 years old and I should have my own house, my own care, my own job, and that I'm a loser. They don't want to help me, but I am grateful for the small acts of kindness they sometimes do for me. I cannot count on it, though.

    I have had a rough go of things mostly because of the post traumatic stress, depression, anxiety for the past decade. I've gone to therapy and sought help to try to work through those issues the best I could, and here I am now.

    I have not told them I have bed bugs, because I am too afraid of being judged and shunned. My sister does know. She's a caseworker. She probably already told them, or she will out me at any given moment. I am constantly afraid of the judgment, ridicule, stigma, isolation and rejection that could happen any minute. I also feel like a piece of dirt, and that I should not be around other people, because I have bed bugs. And it's not fair for me to be around other people. I feel VERY isolated and alone. That's why I'm reaching out here.

    I am not comfortable doing laundry at someone else's house because I do not want to infest their house. But, I also have to wash my son's school clothes, and I also need clean clothes to wear. I am very stressed out about it and nervous the whole time laundry is being done. So far, I haven't brought any bugs to anyone else's house. So far so good. I've been very careful.

    Because of my laundry situation, I have to conserve clothing and I only change my clothes twice a week because I do not have a enough stuff to wear. I shower and put the same clothes back on. I don't have many options.

    I keep a half a trash bag full of clean clothes tied up. The rest of the clothes we own had been folding in neat piles on the floor for months because we have no dressers to put them in. So, I'm willing to bet those are all infested.

    I don't even have storage. I can't go to the store to purchase plastic storage containers. I can't take a big bulky container on the shuttle bus. And my boyfriend will yell at me if I spend money on plastic containers because he doesn't think we need them.

    He is careless. He leaves his clothes on the floor still, and he is not careful about spreading the infestation at all. He's not going anywhere, either. We are ALL on the rent program and nobody can tell another person to leave, because that would force him into homelessness. I mean, unless it was a serious domestic violence issue, which it's not. He's just careless.

    4. WHOLE APARTMENT BUILDING IS INFESTED

    Yup, that's right. The neighbor's hired an exterminator and the exterminator knocked on my door and asked me if I wanted to hire him too. I could not afford to hire him, I only receive $100 per month. But, it was confirmed that the other apartments were also infested!!!!

    The rental assistance program does not help with beg bug removal. The landlord will not pay for bed bug removal, and it is written into the lease that if pests are discovered in the unit, it's my responsibility to get rid of them.

    Which I could understand if it were just my apartment, but this is the entire property. I don't know how they got in, and it doesn't really matter. They are here now. 3 tenants have moved in and out of the other units since I have lived here. Anyone could have brought them. The walls have cracks, it's a cheap apartment.

    5. NO MISTAKE - I'M SURE THESE ARE BEDBUGS!

    I lived here for a matter of months, I want to say a good 4 or 5 months before I started to get bit. That was the summer of last year 2017. At first, I was just waking up with welts on me and I didn't know why. I thought it was an allergic reaction and I just went back to sleep again in the same bed.

    We were given two kittens, who would've been dropped off to die because they didn't have a home. So, at first, I blamed it on FLEAS. I took measures to keep the cats off the bed! Well, it's not fleas.

    I didn't come to the realization that these were bed bugs until we were 6 months into an infestation, and I kept searching for answers to my welts. I didn't know anything about bedbugs and I've never had them before. I never thought I would have them, and I've never thought about them before in my life.

    Well, now I've got them.

    6. COUCH IS ALL I HAVE LEFT

    The couch is the only soft furniture that I have left. Beds are gone. We are not allowed to throw out any more furniture. We were warned by the landlord that if tenants kept throwing out furniture, they were in violation of the lease. The city won't take bulky items every week. And I am NOW aware of the danger of spreading the infestation by throwing stuff out. I was not aware of that before, I just wants the infested mattresses GONE! I honestly thought the bugs lived only in the beds and throwing out the beds would get rid of them. Now I don't have beds.

    The couch is torn and ripped. A couch cover online costs over a hundred dollars, I can't afford it! What about the cats scratching the cover if I actually DID save up for one and get one? I can't throw the couch out because there's nowhere to put it and it's the only thing we have to sit on. It's a love seat. Me and my son sleep on it together, and I half hang off of it resting my legs on the coffee table.

    So, on so little sleep, so much depression, feeling so powerless, not being able to get any of the jobs I have applied for, and seeing NO WAY OUT. I don't know what to do anymore. I barely have enough energy to run the vaccuum and clean up after my son and my boyfriend. Yes, they should clean up after themselves, but unless I tell them to, they don't. And when I tell them too, it starts world war three and I get accused of being controlling and bossy.

    7. ISSUE IS CAUSING FIGHTS

    I cry a lot. I wake up hourly throughout the night cursing and swearing at bugs, and then having mild anxiety attacks before I can fall back to sleep again.

    My boyfriend said he doesn't want to hear another word about bed bugs, he's sick of hearing my complain about it, and that I'm not DOING anything about it. I think I am doing as much as I CAN do, by researching, learning about them, vaccuuming, cleaning up, and I have a whole notebook filled with goals and ideas. I do not have the means to achieve these goals and buy this stuff, or at least move to a noninfested place, but I'm putting together a PLAN of action, and I'm being as careful as possible. None of which will actually get rid of the bed bugs. I got ziplock bags, rubbing alcohol, stuff I could afford. I am constantly making sure clothing is not on the floor.

    I also take medication for intracranial hypertension, there is too much cerebrospinal fluid pushing on my brain, a neurological disorder. I take diamox to remove the excess fluid to keep from going blind. And it makes me very tired, on top of the not getting a full night's sleep.

    His suggestions are to wipe down the air mattress and he thinks that will fix it. And he keeps telling me to take the bedding to my mom's to wash it, but I'm too scared to wash the blankets there and give her beg bugs, too. He keeps accusing me of not doing anything about it, but he's really not doing anything about it. Nothing at all, except yelling at me because my complaining gets on his nerves.

    My family already thinks I'm a no-good lowlife because I don't have a job.

    They would completely shun me if they knew I had bedbugs, and if I gave them bedbugs, I would be punished severely, blamed, talked about, and completely isolated and alone.

    NOTHING IS WORSE THAN HAVING BED BUGS. I was traumatized ten years ago, saw my fiance die of massive pulmonary emboli, and it still was not worse than having bed bugs. I see people on tv shows laying in beds or sitting on couches and I think at least they don't have bed bugs, I wish I could lay in a bed, too. Any problem that anyone has in their life, I just think at least you don't have bed bugs.

    This is a living hell.

    Suggestions, support, something I haven't thought of? PLEASE HELP.

  2. 0hn0

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    Posted 1 year ago
    Fri Mar 30 2018 11:41:39
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    This all around sounds horrible and stressful. It does sound like maybe your only option from here is to keep applying to jobs (my advice is, if possible, apply for three a day, not three a week: do you have access to the internet?), to make some more money and maybe try to treat DIY. You may not be able to get rid of the infestation but you might be able to get bitten less. You might also see if you can do payment plans with exterminators?

    I'm sorry that your BF isn't taking it seriously.

    IDK about the legality of the lease thing, but I'm sure you also don't have money to consult a lawyer or go to court. But you sound crazy stressed, so I think that the best plan for you right now is to solve the root of a lot of your other worries, which is employment and money. Hang in there and keep applying for jobs.

  3. 0hn0

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    Posted 1 year ago
    Fri Mar 30 2018 11:42:51
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    Also: does your town/city have social services that do anything in the way of clothing/basic need/food vouchers? Are there churches that might donate clothing, or other clothing drives?

  4. 0hn0

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    Posted 1 year ago
    Fri Mar 30 2018 11:54:46
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    Also: does your town/city have social services that do anything in the way of clothing/basic need/food vouchers? Are there churches that might donate clothing, or other clothing drives? Also remember: bed bugs can cause people intense distress and anxiety. That really comes through in your post. Are you enrolled in any type of health insurance? Can you see a therapist or even a social worker to help you with finding work/other assistance programs? Are there free or sliding scale clinics in your city that might help with that? Trauma alone is very serious, but bedbugs can be the cherry on top of existing mental health issues (it is for me and my OCD/Anxiety). Bed bugs won't keep you from finding a job or moving on in your life--don't let them take over everything, and become all you can think about!

  5. Livingagain

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    Posted 1 year ago
    Fri Mar 30 2018 11:57:58
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    Tough situation that you are in. So sorry. If I were in your situation I would see what I could do with Cimexa. Search the forums here to get ideas about how to use it the best. It's very inexpensive, and people have definitely gotten rid of bed bugs with it before. See if you can force more action from your landlord, too. He's responsible.

  6. Pattycake

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    Posted 1 year ago
    Fri Mar 30 2018 14:44:54
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    Omg. I really feel sorry for you. Everybody who has dealt with these pests can understand your anxiety. Your hopeless feelings are not unusual. I understand the BF not believing or understanding. I am in the same predicament. He does get bit but blames it on other things. I feel if we should have a go fund me page for you. I don’t have a lot but if you PM your address I will have some Cimexa sent to you. It won’t get rid of your BB forever , but used properly, could help some. I would check with your Dr. And see if it would be safe for you to take a over the counter Benadryl or store brand. It helps with the itching and usually will make you tired enough to sleep through the night. Again it appears you are on some other meds so I would discuss this with your Dr or pharmacist first. I wish there was more I could do to help.

  7. bb0025

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    Posted 1 year ago
    Fri Mar 30 2018 16:35:30
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    I'm sorry, I truly feel for you. I have a phobia of bugs and have had to deal with these evil things through it. The only way I get through nights is "they're just bugs", just like any other bug... and you can't prevent those from touching you once in a while. Benadryl helps my itchiness. Even if you are not willing to share your city, I suggest looking at the legality of what this landlord is doing... I hate this person for what they're doing to you and the other tenants. Most likely, this is a scummy exterminator as well who is just going to spray once in a while. And there's no guarantee the other tenants will go through with the thorough cleaning process necessary for eradication, either... I wish I were in a better situation myself to donate to you.

    The best solution would be to drop everything and move, but I understand your situation.

  8. tripturnedintoanightmare

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    Posted 1 year ago
    Sun Apr 1 2018 10:23:26
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    That's a terrible story, I can't do anything for you and your son but I feel for both of you. One of the people who answered you offered to send you some cimexa, this is so nice of him/her, I think it's very generous and could be part of the solution for you and your son.

  9. jacksonsi

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    Posted 1 year ago
    Sun Apr 1 2018 20:02:06
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    My heart is just breaking reading your story. Bed bugs are horrible and you are not alone. I have been dealing with these bugs for six months.I have spent thousands of dollars and I still have them 😒😒Do your very best to vacuum every crack and crevice , every day. ! I read on here to mix Murphy oil soap and alcohol in a spray bottle to clean with. I am also willing to send you a bottle of Cimexa too. Please message me your address.


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