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I'm really fearful, sick inside

(2 posts)
  1. BettyV4

    junior member
    Joined: Nov '08
    Posts: 116


    Posted 10 years ago
    Mon Apr 6 2009 8:30:36

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    This morning I woke up to an engorged bb between my two encased pillows. I had just posted where I thought I was going insane; imagining the reoccurance; I think I was very sane. I hadn't seen an engorged in several, several weeks. I've just been treated; furniture thrown out; floors done; my clothes are still in bags in the kitchen - my daughter's room is still a mess - she doesn't get bit - my room is literally empty except for my bed, a parsons table, my C-Pap, closets are empty. Yet I was doing so much better the last two days - actually had two great days. Then this morning - I thought about those ativans I have. Thought about taking a lot. However, that's not me. Close, but not me. I called my PCO, therapist, and am posting here. Can't believe I'm supposed to live like this. My house is attached; yet with the work that was just done I don't think any bugs are going to come through the walls. Where did this bb come from and why my bed? How did it get into my bed? I wish all of you could take this horrific, scary feeling away from me. I feel like I'm back months ago. And so it continues......

  2. angie

    Joined: Nov '07
    Posts: 396


    Posted 10 years ago
    Mon Apr 6 2009 9:54:04

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    Betty, it takes ALONG time to get rid of these bugs. Believe me, I do know how you are feeling. The lack of sleep and the constant cleaning and laundry took its toll on me too when I was living in BedBugHaven. I would drink way toooo much and then get depressed and get angry. I would come to this site just to get the comfort that only sufferers or formers can offer. Even my husband didn't understand why I would walk the floors at all hours and search every nook and cranny and every spot and why I would vaccum 4+ times a day. Only those who know what it is like will understand. Keep your head clear and know that someday it will be over. Take walks, go to the park, just get out with friends or family and remember, keep smiling. It took me over 9 months to stop looking at every spot on the walls and to actually look down, instead of up. I am now bug free for 14 months and I can finally sleep. You will get there too, just have faith in that. Good luck!! Sending you hugs from cyperspace!!!

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