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I'm poisoning myself! Please help!!

(4 posts)
  1. FedUpWithBeingFedUpon

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    Posted 3 years ago
    Thu Mar 31 2016 22:38:12
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    I'm seriously going to kill myself over these f*c king bugs! I'm not even sure I have them, at this point. I'll start at the beginning. ..

    I was given a wooden bed frame about 3 years ago. I went into the bathroom one morning, and found a bug crawling on my arm. I had never seen one like it before, so I looked it up. It was an adult bed bug. I didn't even know they really existed!!! I tried DE so many times, I went through 2 vacuum cleaners. I think I put it on too thick, I don't know. Eventually, I threw away half my stuff, including the bed. Eventually, I moved.

    I've been in my new apt for a year. I seriously haven't SEEN a solitary bug, since the first bug I saw. Yet, I'm always feeling itchy! I get some red bumps on my face, mostly around my mouth.  I've gotten rid of even MORE stuff, I recently bought a mattress & a box spring encasement, put Cimetrex (sp?) powder along every wall/carpet edge, on, in, under, and around every piece of furniture. I ripped the cover from the bottom of my love seat, and powdered inside, around every inch I could. I've used 1 1/2 bottles on a tiny, 1bdrm apt. Last month, I also used a can of Bedlam Plus all over the couch, and on my bed. I've kept my clothes separated from everything, immediately putting them in the washing machine when I get undressed. I keep my night clothes on my bed. I do everything I can think of, and I'm pretty sure I'm poisoning myself, not the bugs.

    I would think it's in my head, but everytime I sit down on my couch, I feel like I'm getting bitten. I feel little, tiny "pricks", almost tingling feelings, plus bigger, "wtf just bit me" feelings. All of it makes me itch.  I thought it might be just me, but my grandkids come to spend the night, (they sleep on the front room floor), and they itch like crazy, especially on their heads. And, today I had company, and she kept scratching, saying she was itchy. I live in apts, and I'm scared to death to tell my manager, bcuz I can't afford to pay an exterminator, or get kicked out. I know they will insist it's my fault, I can't prove it isn't, and my contact says I have to pay if I end up with bb.

    I look for all the signs, fecal matter, casings, and bugs, but find nothing. The other day, I took a magnifying light from my phone, and took pictures of everything I found on my bed,  and the red spots on my face. I don't get "bumps" anywhere else on my body, but I know they aim for your breath. I'm on disability w/chronic pain & fatigue problems, so I can't afford to keep this up either financially, physically, or emotionally.  I'm ready to buy Gentrol IGR, & Temprid this weekend, and spray every thing in my world. I'm already getting headaches, and feel like I breathe dust, so I don't want to keep poisoning my environment. I have yet to find a harborage, more than 1 tiny black "speck", in one place, that could be fecal matter, or any other signs of BB.

    I finally have pictures I took of my mattress cover, after waking up & searching with the magnifying light.  I STUPIDLY ate a bit of granola on the bed the previous night,  so now I don't know if what I found was crumbs, or bug related. I'm seriously losing my mind. I need some feedback, SOON!

    The "feces" I took pics of,  all look like little rectangles under the magnifier. I DID find one tiny thing that I think might be a casing, or a dead bug. I also had lidocaine patches on, and found what might be casings?
    Link is in a reply message, as I couldn't attach it here, for some reason.

    Thanks, in advance!
  2. FedUpWithBeingFedUpon

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    Posted 3 years ago
    Thu Mar 31 2016 22:45:35
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  3. idkbutfreakingout

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    Posted 3 years ago
    Fri Apr 1 2016 1:48:18
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    I'm sorry this is causing you so much stress. It is really hard on a person's mental health. There is a topic thread in the green window of the forum that discusses that.

    I won't comment on your photos, because I am not an expert, but someone will come and look at them.
    I know I jump at every stain, every piece of fluff. It's maddening.

    I hope you find out what is causing this soon and can get some relief. Hang in there.

  4. Nobugsonme

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    Posted 3 years ago
    Fri Apr 1 2016 2:18:43
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    Fedup,
    The site has a policy of closing threads where people talk about suicide. You can read about the reasons why in the forum rules: http://bedbugger.com/forum/topic/forum-rules-please-read

    If you are considering harming yourself, please talk to someone, ideally a doctor or mental health professional. There are free hotlines listed in this thread ("If you are feeling suicidal or anxious...") which may help: http://bedbugger.com/forum/topic/if-you-are-feeling-suicidal-or-anxious-1

    When you are ready, you can post your messages above and the image for an ID (copy/edit and paste to a new thread).

    Sorry that I have to close this thread but I hope you will get some support if needed, and that you will repost th bed bug questions when ready.

    I started and run the site but am "not an expert."

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