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HaPpY THaNKsGiVING all Ye BBeDbuGGERs out there [OT / adult language/humor]

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  1. bedbugsuptown

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Thu Nov 24 2011 10:09:55
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    Happy Thanksgiving to the host, administrators, and all bedbuggers out there large and small. And may all the bb's large and small go hungry tonite--word

    Seriously and in gratitude: Thank you all. Thanx for the shared stories; thanx for the endless supply of pathos and wisdom that is passed along this forum-- from each and every newbite to the seasoned posters that continue to share their knowledge and wit, and-- to the professionals who always seem to be there when we need them. You guys~ a most blessed Thanksgiving.

    May no one be alone today because of bb. madness. If your home is in too much disarray to carry on with your usually holiday routine-or- if your afraid of infesting family and loved ones--eat-out.
    Just don't be alone; (unless your the loner kind--which I completely understand). If your traveling--packtite and travel rite. We are well armed with the knowledge we have gained from this priceless website and the incredible community of bedbuggers that participate on the boards. Bedbugger.com is more Fellowship than website. Word.

    Last, a humble thanx to nobugs and her staff for manning the boards from dawn till dusk. And thanx for my upgrade to Junior Member. Just like our bugs~I figured it was only a matter of time.

    Nobugs, your the best--Happy Thanksgiving.

  2. Nobugsonme

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Thu Nov 24 2011 15:40:10
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    Thanks, bedbugsuptown, for your kind words.

    Happy Thanksgiving to you and to all who celebrate it.

    And I would echo your thanks to the bed bug experts and bedbuggers new and old who participate in the site. Thanks for making this a great community and resource!

    I started and run the site but am "not an expert."
  3. cilecto

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Thu Nov 24 2011 18:15:21
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    Amen.

    Thou shalt not be afraid for the terror by night...
    - Psalms 91:5-7

    (Not an pro)
  4. makesmenuts

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Thu Nov 24 2011 19:00:13
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    Great post, and Happy Thanksgiving to all! In this economy, we can all at least be thankful that we have a place to live, even if we're sharing it with vampires. Myself, I'm thankful for all the headway, and hopefully next year I'll be thankful for being completely BB free. May you all have a lovely holiday season. Take good care of yourselves; holiday stress is enough without the stress of BBs added.

  5. bedbugsuptown

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Sat Nov 26 2011 8:35:45
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    Take good care of yourselves; holiday stress is enough without the stress of BBs added.

    Thanks makesmenuts, y'all make me HaPpY! Specially you Cilecto. makesmenutsthat's a darn good piece of advice....the holidays/bb's--could be pretty damn toxic if you don't put a check on it.
    Earlier today I posted this little gem: Re-a persons stream of conscious--or the b*l s*it buggers and civilians allow to run inside the head-- if their not payin' rent--kick 'em out!

  6. bed-bugscouk

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Sat Nov 26 2011 9:31:35
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    What is this thanksgiving you talk about?

    Normal working days here, I think I will have to start a take back the colonies campaign next year as you all seem to have better holidays than we do.

    Hoping everyone had a chilled and relaxed Turkey time, we don't get a break here till this time next month.

    David

    I am happy to answer questions in public but will not reply to message sent directly or via my company / social media. I am here to help everyone and not just one case at a time.

    In accordance with the AUP and FTC I openly disclose my vested interest in Passive Monitors as the inventor and patent holder. Since 2009 they have become an integral part in how we resolve bed bug infestations. I also have a professional relationship with PackTite in that they distribute my product under their own branding. I do not however receive any financial remuneration for any comments I make about pro
  7. bedbugsuptown

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Sat Nov 26 2011 14:54:07
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    David, I'm sorry for your troubles. You want the colonies back honey, well, take 'em if yall' wiggy House of Condoms think they can take us. Go have your selves a little tea party while yall' at it. Me, I'll think about that tomorrow(background music-- Virgil Caine is the name and I served on the Danville Train-Till Stoneman's cavalary came and tore up the tracks again............) yeah, I know this is definitely headed south.

    But hold the phone a minute here David. Don't you got something called National Health??? Us, pardon me David, I mean the US--we got OBAMA CARE BABY. (Jeeze Louise, I know I'm hearing Jesse Jackson's 'Keep hope alive" slogan in the background now). And once upon a time were not certain clinics in London handing out heroin for all the British-addicts? If your house-of-whatever decides to do that again gwon, come get me. Put on your red coats and grab your muskets. I'm fourth generation Welsh so Tom Jones, book a ticket from Vegas to JFK and take me home.

    Well I'm tired of waitin' on Tom....think I'll have a nap; it is a four day weekend here in the States.

    How much time you get for HAPPY CHRISTMAS over there anyway? Most American's won't even have a day off cuz it falls on a Sunday this year. Christmas Monday, Fugetaboutit. These days you won't hardly hear a Merry Christmas on the TV. It's all Happy Holidays!!! And when they do acknowledge Christmas they put it in a line up with Hanukkah and Kwanza--one big fat politically correct package. All those young dudes, they've been doin it for years. Now I'm all for Hanukkah and Kwanza--I just don't like the way the media sticks it all in a PactTite and it comes out all dried up and meaningless. Come on now...pass the gravy.

    Okay, we got the Independence Day, the Forth of July, but YOU just finished celebrating GUY FAWKS' Holiday. I don't think it gets any better than that. Yall' get to hang some Englishmen every year and then burn his ass. Now that sounds lika party to me!

  8. bedbugsuptown

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Sat Nov 26 2011 16:54:53
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    [i]Now u know i didn't mean a word of that. God bless America--please God, bless America......cuz I was BORN IN THE USA. Yes I was-- and my husband and two of my brother's were drafted and sent overthere to Vietnam. My husband and one brother were based in a place called Lai Khe. Long before the war it was a sugar plantation--the French had it.

    He was with the 173rd. Assault Helicopter Company. They called themselves The Robin Hoods.
    I don't know if the platoons had got bedbugs when they were flown by helicopter into the middle of some jungle up toward the north. They were in Nam in '66-67-- before they sprayed the agent orange to exfoliate the jungle. Now that shit would more than likely kill all stages of bedbugs and their eggs. But everyone knows....Vietnam vets don't talk about that dumb war. When they came home hippies would spit on their jackets if they dared to wear their old fatigues. God bless my husband and those two brothers, they all died young. That war made 'em all kinda buggy on some level.

    STAND BESIDE HER, AND GUIDE HER,
    TOWARD THE BANKERS THAT FLOAT PHISHY LOANS.
    TO THEIR HIGH RISE, LET THE BUGS CLIMB,
    CAUSE THEY CAN CLIMB --VERTICALLY-- -- --
    SUCK ON BAD BANKING BLOOD, LET THEM KNOW MISERY-
    GOD BLESS AMERICA, AND BLESS OUR FAMILIES

    *i apologise in advance to any wrong-thinking buggers on the forum. this is a polite site. so don't let the bedbugs bite even if you are a greedy wall street fat cat--may God forgive you and not infest your home or office with bedbugs~amen*

  9. bed-bugscouk

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Mon Nov 28 2011 6:41:24
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    Our campaign to take back the colonies will start 5th July 2012, we will all sneak in while you recover from the hang overs.

    David

  10. bedbugsuptown

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Tue Nov 29 2011 23:44:53
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    Great! Make sure the troops fill canteens of coffee. This is really really keen. I see paratroopers dropping like bedbugs from the ceiling onto American soil.

    THE BRITISH INVASION~YEAH YEAH YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!

  11. soretit

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Wed Nov 30 2011 4:38:33
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    bedbugsuptown - 5 days ago  » 

    " this priceless website"

    Even Churchill couldnt have said it better.

    I dont know who runs this site or for what reasons as I havent been around more than a few days.
    But I think you are terrific and very glad you are around and, just as importantly, open-minded and not PC.

    Happy Thanksgiving to those who celebrate it and those who dont.

  12. soretit

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Wed Nov 30 2011 4:52:43
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    Lol.
    Yeah, God Bless America.
    I'll drink to that.
    But it wont be with Malathion.
    It,ll be something stronger.
    Something Scottish.
    Have a good one, Dear Cousins.

  13. bedbugsuptown

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Wed Nov 30 2011 10:36:04
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    " this priceless website"

    Even Churchill couldnt have said it better.

    I dont know who runs this site or for what reasons as I havent been around more than a few days.

    Thanx soretit. This website was conceived and dedicated to bringing all poor, tired and suffering bedbuggers together for answers/support/and community by nobugsonme our host. And we all take our hats off to nobugs ...... no one's better than nobugs. nobugs is among the most stand-up people that I've not been honored to meet.

    But never mind nobugs--whats up with the tag? Are you a nursing mother or dija just get bit on the tit,
    --no inappropriateness intended--by a bb. I[b] just
    read a couple of ur old posts. (It's the smart thing to do though I often run on impulse.) So your another artiste. Pleased to meet you. I find that talent and a metro card get me on the train-can you dig that. I'm not a kid, see. Moreover I don't know hardly a thing about the current art tec. Illustration--forget it unless you"re super savvy with the programs. Hope you are.

    My 'clutter' of beautiful objects all thrown out.

    That's really sad, but I'm guessing your young enough to acquire new stuff. Look, when you come up with some extra scratch, buy yourself a PactTite. It will kill anything that fits inside, eggs and all. But listen up. If you do invest in the bug oven (that's what it is--check it out) order it through bedbugger.com. A small portion of your payment rolls back to bedbugger.com to help support this PRICLESS SITE !!!!

  14. soretit

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Wed Nov 30 2011 14:05:21
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    Thanks bedbugs uptown.
    I love that tag, in fact most tags on this site.
    Mine?
    In the UK everyone says sorted.
    Its just another way of spelling it, thats all.
    And I was so fed up with getting no real hard nailed down facts from anyone:-
    So if I seemed a bit pissed off I apologise but its done now.
    I run on impulse too but only because this is such a serious pain in the neck.
    (edited).
    No, I dont have kids (not of nursing age,lol ) and cannot begin to understand how people in that situ can cope with it.
    I mean just awful.
    And then those who are infirm.
    I cant even begin to get my head round that, especially the bed-ridden.
    And so many cant afford help or move.
    I aim to try to help them, if I can.

    Yeah I can get some more stuff but probably wont as I like it better now!
    It is sort of 'minimalist with bedbugs' style.
    They have totally halted my work as I work from my flat.
    So I really need to get this sorted.
    Which I will.
    And I am NOT moving.
    There has got to be a way, for goodness sakes they are only ruddy insects.
    We went to the moon for pity's sake.
    Woops I'm off on one again.
    Down Boy!
    (Big edit)
    I think you can gather I dont think prayer, though cheap, wont help.
    So we got to help ourselves.
    Like invent and patent Buttplugs.
    I loved that.
    I am pretty sure these guys are fly.

    And Art is cool and its good to talk to another.
    Even about bedbugs!
    When this is sorted I am going to make an animation of a bedbug exploding.
    And I will donate it to this fantastic site.

    Have you a PC or laptop?
    If you have and you interested in doing some 3D not every programme is complicated.
    You can make some seriously good stuff quite easily.
    And you can download it free and legally to use it.
    Check out a site called DAZ.com and look at the section called Bryce.
    Thats how I got started.
    Check it out. Youtube got all the lessons and tutorials to learn you.
    I wont go on as it is off topic, I guess, but just this once.
    Give you something to occupy your mind, take it off the bugs, hopefully.

    This site, Bedbuggers, this is the best at the moment on the web.
    But we all know that.
    The secret is out!
    Thanks to all of those involved in it.

    Hope you get a good nights sleep BedBugsuptown!
    (Wow, still knocks me out to think you in USA talking to me in UK,etc etc. ).

  15. Nobugsonme

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Wed Nov 30 2011 18:10:58
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    soretit - 13 hours ago  » 

    bedbugsuptown - 5 days ago  » 
    " this priceless website"

    Even Churchill couldnt have said it better.
    I dont know who runs this site or for what reasons as I havent been around more than a few days.

    Hi soretit,

    Thanks for your kind words.

    I run the site and I started it because when I had bed bugs years ago, there was little good information on the internet and it was hard to find. Even many government and university websites gave out information even I -- as a consumer new to this pest -- knew to be poor (for example, many used to recommend OTC foggers/bombs for bed bugs).

    I knew this to be wrong because I had heard as much from folks like AMNH entomologist Lou Sorkin (who was, incidentally, the first person after me to join this site as a user, but just the first of many experts who have helped so many of us here).

    However, I can't take much credit for the site's usefulness. The site would be nothing without the participation of both experts as well as other consumers who stuck around to support others after their bed bug problems were treated.

  16. bed-bugscouk

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Wed Nov 30 2011 20:24:58
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    soretit - 6 hours ago  » 

    Like invent and patent Buttplugs.

    Too late my spies tell me the site went live today http://www.bedbugbutplug.com

    David

  17. theyareoutthere

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Wed Nov 30 2011 22:43:18
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    They
    Are
    Out
    There
    = TAOT
  18. bedbugsuptown

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Wed Nov 30 2011 23:43:07
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    (Wow, still knocks me out to think you in USA talking to me in UK,etc etc. ).

    yeah, me to soretit. Your name is still crackin me up. wtf does 'sorted' mean? Thanks to the world wide web I can likely google that. Yeah, I think I'll start something new...........if anyone says something that confuses you, like on purpose. Like someone with passive/aggressive intentions--you just say--google that (period) If some ahole pisses u off you tell 'em off with a--google that--and walk away real cool and collected.

    So, like are all yr bugs gone? Is this a British success story? Not 100% sure? Well me neither, but I think the suckers are gone. I just get to thinkin they'll be back--like next summer. They live on inside your head and they don't pay rent. It may be harder to evict them from your bugged out mind than than from your bagged up crib.

    Listen, I gotta get some shuteye. I like your style soretit--later gator. And thanks for the art/computer tips. I gotta laptop and will check this out down the road apiece.

    PS--regarding my tag--it comes from the Stones song 'Shattered'--Some Girls album, 1978 I think.

    To live in this town, you must be tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough (Shadoobie, shattered, shadoobie, shattered, shattered)
    You got rats on the west side, bed bugs uptown (Shadoobie, shattered)
    What a mess, this town's in tatters, I've been shattered (Shadoobie, shattered)

    Thanks Mick. And especially you Keith. (soretit, if i can cut and paste Stones lyrics perhaps I can learn how to cybersize my talent.)

  19. bedbugsuptown

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Wed Nov 30 2011 23:48:17
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    soretit - 6 hours ago »

    Like invent and patent Buttplugs.

    gwon an google that. Mr. Cain. U BUSTED. Brang it on baby.

  20. bedbugsuptown

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Wed Nov 30 2011 23:53:34
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    Too late my spies tell me the site went live today bedbugbutplug.com

    I know Boris and Natasha from way back. During the cold war. Were still in touch, so watch your step.

  21. Nobugsonme

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Thu Dec 1 2011 0:58:00
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    Things are going to get even more interesting around here when Google picks up this page and the term "butt plugs".

  22. soretit

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Thu Dec 1 2011 10:29:09
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    Careful.
    I might change my tag to buttplugisallcorrectandinpositionSIR!
    It still wouldn't be the longest tag, judging by some I saw yesterday.
    If I placed an 'i' in front I might just possibly beat Apple to ownership of the word.

    At the rate they are going soon God is going to have to replace the Apple Eve held with a jelly-bean or spanner and each page will bear adverts down the side column.
    Well if they do I think David and Nobugsonme( I dont know your real name but God does(yawn)) should replace the original names.

    Sometimes you come across a special site which is recognised by those who discover it as extraordinary. They are rare and this site is one of those.
    Thank you.

    BBuptown you are a gale of fresh air.
    I love the bit "the best person I have not met".
    Likwise yourself, cousin.
    So pleased you didn't throw your laptop out when De-cluttering!
    As if. Lol.

    Well I awoke at 1.30 PM so my first good nights over sleep for 7 weeks and a day.
    Hoo *@!?ing ray!
    Your positive attitude and the websites members help are to thank for that.
    All of them.
    I mean at least I woke up as opposed to not as Ravfan99 rightly pointed out.
    So emphatically.
    No worries mate. If you are reading this sorry I snapped.
    We are all in this together.
    If you can put up with a neophyte spouting obvious epiphets.
    Damn. Knew I couldnt spell that one right.
    And BBuptown, sorted means to have solved the problem.
    Its cockney (I think) and can be seen in action in the film Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels.
    Thats would be another good tag.
    My misspelling it (sorted) is a result of turning off spellchecker so you can blame MicroSoft for allowing that option. Hmmm.....

    Well I got to go and microwave my bedding and follow the rest of my debug routine for the day.
    I think you all excellent fellow(e)s and hope I can contribute, not just take advice, to the community.
    I just hope that what we do cant be constituted as buggery.
    I dont want a Fatwah or Rome closing down this site.
    I am fed up with bending over for those bastards.
    The bed bugs I mean.
    Lets be mean back.
    You know what I mean.

    BBuptown, Nobugsonme and David, have a top day and to you all lets sort out this problem.
    Laters Crocodiles!

  23. bed-bugscouk

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Thu Dec 1 2011 11:04:32
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    Hi soretit,

    All correct and incorrect spellings all link through to the one site now. I have updated a few but kind of hope it goes viral as its all about getting people to stop, think and look at sites with good information.

    It has also made a lot of people laugh. I may even add the image we have of the product in use.

    David

  24. cilecto

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Thu Dec 1 2011 11:48:03
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    Did the commas go on strike when you put up the BBBP site?
    Why aren't the adult BBs all the same size, regardless of the BP size?

  25. bed-bugscouk

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Thu Dec 1 2011 11:52:06
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    Tut, there is always a critic.

    On the budget we had it was the best we could do given pressures on time at present.

    If you wish to to submit corrections or suggestions I will get you some lube

    Its a work in progress what can I say.

    David

  26. Nobugsonme

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Thu Dec 1 2011 13:07:51
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    I for one am glad bedbugsuptown and soretit have found one another.

    Note: warning label added to subject. It used up the character limit, but is it explicit enough?

  27. bed-bugscouk

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Thu Dec 1 2011 13:11:42
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    Nobugsonme - 2 minutes ago  » 
    I for one am glad bedbugsuptown and soretit have found one another.

    Is that because you want to shop for a new hat?

    Do we need a lonely hearts section on the site?

    I already have a suitable wedding present or two picked out, LOL.

    David

  28. Nobugsonme

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    Posted 7 years ago
    Thu Dec 1 2011 13:47:38
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    bed-bugscouk - 31 minutes ago  » 

    Nobugsonme - 2 minutes ago  » 
    I for one am glad bedbugsuptown and soretit have found one another.

    Is that because you want to shop for a new hat?
    Do we need a lonely hearts section on the site?
    I already have a suitable wedding present or two picked out, LOL.
    David

    Yes, and single PMPs would be
    Much in demand. As I noted a long time ago, I think a lot of single bedbuggers dream of hooking up with a PMP who is licensed to eliminate all future bed bug issues.

    Talk about knights on white horses.

  29. soretit

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    Thu Dec 1 2011 16:59:34
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    bed-bugscouk - 5 hours ago  » 

    All correct and incorrect spellings

    Are we talking politcally here?

    Oh and while we are on the subject of being subtle, considerate and deferential
    I meant camp as in campervan, not Irish priest. Lol.

    But please buy the hat anyway.
    As long its not the sort a beekeeper wears.

    That might attract a few too many stares from fellow NewYorkers.
    They probably think honey grows on trees from nuts.
    Well I guess most Londoners do.
    Honeynutcrunchers all.
    Thats word sent spelcheck on one.
    Woops so did that.

    Sorted.
    Blacknight signing off!

  30. bedbugsuptown

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    Thu Dec 1 2011 22:20:23
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    Hey nobugs, soretit is right about not being seen in a bee keeper hat. Shucks, if your wear a bee keeper hat everyone 'll be chasing after u for yr autograph. They'll be snapping your picture on their cells cuz you'll be mistaken for gaga.

  31. bedbugsuptown

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    Thu Dec 1 2011 22:23:39
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    nobugs......you know how i feel about those worn-out labels. Thanks for the warning--luvit

  32. Nobugsonme

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    Thu Dec 1 2011 22:54:54
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    A lid for every pot, soretit and bedbugsuptown. That's all I'm saying.

  33. bedbugsuptown

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    Fri Dec 2 2011 9:49:58
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    Nobugs,
    I hold you in very high regard. In the past I used to tell my kids to put a lid on it, like on a regular basis.

    A small portion of your payment rolls back to bedbugger.com to help support this PRICLESS SITE !!!!

    Nobugsonme, hopefully you know that bold type was a typo and not me playin fast and loose with words. Last nite I was cruising through this thread and caught it. I was horrified for a moment and then, given my nature --just cracked up again. I doubt that I've ever posted about being a Roman Catholic. Roman Catholics are not very popular these days. I'm also a catechist and teach the faith to kids that attend public/private schools. Depending on a persons age and where they grew up it used to be called CCD. I teach 3 classes a week on Mon./Tues./Wed. Two second grade classes and one third grade. Now I'm not your typical catechist. Last May at the First Holy Communion of the second graders the asst. to the Director of the program told me that she asked the Pastor--Wouldn't you have liked to have had Mrs Doe as your teacher? The assistant reported that with a wide grin the Pastor said YES!

    Maybe your last post was more tongue-in-cheek than 'mimic a nun' You may or may not be Catholic but every one should know that [b]IT AINT EASY!!! aT tiMMeS U GOTTA taKE the CHUrch wITh a GrAIN of SALT. Maybe not quite a grain of salt but many of us who continue to practice believe that the Father/Son and HOley Spirit have one helluva good laugh at the things us creatures are thinkin' n' doin'!!! Lets all put our hands together and pray for all those out there who spray today.

    Gotta run.....I have an appointment with Boris and Natasha about this revolution stuff (All the Young Dudes, written by David Bowie for Mott the Hoople)

  34. bedbugsuptown

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    btw. my confirmation name is Justine and I'm an alchoguilt ridden catholic.

    well I'm off to see T-REXI mean Boris and Natasha. Maybe they can help me understand that bit of code David and Soretit engaged in on this thread.

  35. Nobugsonme

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    Fri Dec 2 2011 12:08:38
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    bedbugsuptown - 2 hours ago  » 
    Nobugs,
    I hold you in very high regard. In the past I used to tell my kids to put a lid on it, like on a regular basis.

    A small portion of your payment rolls back to bedbugger.com to help support this PRICLESS SITE !!!!

    Nobugsonme, hopefully you know that bold type was a typo and not me playin fast and loose with words.

    Hey bedbugsuptown,

    I sure hope we have a Prickless site.

    I try to keep the language and humor civilized, but since this thread has already descended way down into the depths of the bed bug butt plugs and such, I figured, "why not?"

    Note:
    when I said there was a lid for every pot, I was not telling you to put a lid on it. I meant it seemed obvious you and soretit were a match made in heaven. Sorry if that wasn't clear.

  36. bed-bugscouk

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    soretit - 19 hours ago  » 

    As long its not the sort a beekeeper wears.

    Perfect, I was wondering what to wear out on Saturday night and I now have the perfect thing, my old bee keepers suit back in the days where I was mad enough to do general pest control.

    I will let you know if I get mistaken for lady gaga (I should not confess but she is one of my few guilty pleasures in life and were if feasible I would listen while I worked, its fun to drive in traffic to).

    I do also wonder if other forums out there of different specialist natures often break off into chatter as we do? It does make for a fun social aspect to the site which helps for those of us who work such long hours.

    I can only imagine the shenanigans that would occur if we turned this into a chat room, its bad enough when I chat to some people on the phone.

    David

  37. Nobugsonme

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    Fri Dec 2 2011 12:34:24
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    Yes, off-topic chatter is quite standard in online fora.

    So much so that many sites require threads to be labeled off-topic and some try to discourage it.

  38. AshamedandScratching

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    Fri Dec 2 2011 12:36:48
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    This thread makes me wonder what kind of bugs I shared a bed with...BUTT PLUGS?

    Damn.

    Still having more sex than me...

  39. bed-bugscouk

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    Fri Dec 2 2011 12:41:49
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    AshamedandScratching - 4 minutes ago  » 
    Still having more sex than me...

    It's almost the weekend and time for a little traumatic insemination

    David

  40. bed-bugscouk

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    Fri Dec 2 2011 12:43:02
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    Nobugsonme - 7 minutes ago  » 
    Yes, off-topic chatter is quite standard in online fora.

    See its a sad life when all your online friends and interactions are over bedbugs. I lead such a simple and monastic life.

    David

  41. Nobugsonme

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    bed-bugscouk - 8 minutes ago  » 
    See its a sad life when all your online friends and interactions are over bedbugs. I lead such a simple and monastic life.

    Ahem...

  42. bedbugsuptown

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    Fri Dec 2 2011 13:02:59
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    simple and monastic life.

    [quote]I lead such a simple and monastic life.

    David

    The aliens are coming and their goal is to invade and destroy. Fighting superior technology, Man's best weapon is the will to survive and invent a better butt plug

    Director: Roland Emmerich
    Writers: Dean Devlin, Roland Emmerich
    Stars:Will Smith, Bill Pullman and Jeff Goldblum

    That's really sad David. I think you should proceed with you plans for the weekend. I heard a buzz that the aliens from the Movie Independance Day are descending sometime in 2012. If you're spies are still working on that Revolution stuff tell them all them young dudes to hurry the F*ck up

  43. bedbugsuptown

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    On second thought I doubt that Jeff Goldblum or Will Smith got the right stuff for this one. And Chuck Yeager? He's got enough to on his hands with his young wife and mortified daughter to push the envelope something this big. Besides he's like eighty something.

    WE NEED SOME COLLABORATION. EVERY GEEK AND SCIENTIFIC NERD IN THE UK AND AMERICA NEEDS TO GET ON BOARD.

    I know Prince Andrew used to fly helocopters and I heard that he served on the HMS Invincible. But can he fly? Do tell............

  44. bed-bugscouk

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    bedbugsuptown - 9 minutes ago  » 
    I know Prince Andrew used to fly helocopters and I heard that he served on the HMS Invincible. But can he fly? Do tell............

    As the palace is only a few minutes walk from the office I will check into it. I am not sure if he is one of the royals who know about bedbugs. I once interviewed a pest controller who tried to impress me by saying that palaces in London he had treated. Shame it back fired as I was not prepared to employ some that indiscreet.

    David

  45. theyareoutthere

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    See its a sad life when all your online friends and interactions are over bedbugs. I lead such a simple and monastic life.
    </ Ahem...

    The ahem makes me even more suspicious that what has been hinted at is true....

    If there is ever a "cure" found for bedbugs, David will put his time and capital into a business related to his second favorite topic....since he is an inventor, there'd be all sort of scary new toys out there on the internet (the plugs were just the start)

  46. bedbugsuptown

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    Fri Dec 2 2011 21:09:17
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    I think you can gather I dont think prayer, though cheap, wont help.
    So we got to help ourselves.
    Like invent and patent Buttplugs
    .

    soretit--u out there. Don't sleep on this business with Mr Caine. He's takein' off with your material.
    Whatcha gonna do 'bout it? And listen up-- try to keep this on the low. Never mind, I'll pm u if I can
    remember how--copy?

  47. bedbugsuptown

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    Fri Dec 2 2011 21:51:34
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    The ahem makes me even more suspicious that what has been hinted at is true....

    Memo___________________________
    To: theyareoutthere
    Re: not much

    Thanks for the wake-up theyareoutthere, much obliged.

  48. theyareoutthere

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    Fri Dec 2 2011 21:58:29
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    Uh-oh

  49. theyareoutthere

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    Fri Dec 2 2011 22:14:30
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    Bedbugsuptown:

    Whatever you are thinking of...(uh-oh, uh-oh)...I'm sure David has a patent on it. If he doesn't, he will INSIST that you use proper scientific protocols during your testing.

    By the way, I've heard "those" conventions are way more fun than bed bug ones. But, there is a David James that goes each year who has someone charge $1,000 to his room for a liquid lunch. So, some things never change.

    There is also a clown, and he is VERY SCARY!

  50. bedbugsuptown

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    hatever you are thinking of...(uh-oh, uh-oh)...I'm sure David has a patent on it. If he doesn't, he will INSIST that you use proper scientific protocols during your testing.

    [b]By the way, I've heard "those" conventions are way more fun than bed bug ones. But, there is a David James that goes each year who has someone charge $1,000 to his room for a liquid lunch. So, some things never change.

    There is also a clown, and he is VERY SCARY!

    *WIsh I had your memory. I postandforgetaboutit. Thanks for reminding of jdames thread. Your'e right . Djames can not be taken likely.

  51. bedbugsuptown

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    [b]But, there is a David James that goes each year who has someone charge $1,000 to his room for a liquid lunch. So, some things never change.[/b

    Yeah, theyareoutthere--you takin me for a short walk down memory lane. djames is either an operator or paranoid/true vic-humorist.. But I have a different agenda or 2 to see to, But thanx for the memories.

    I forget half the stuff I read and post cepting maybe some of the serious posts to bugged out buggers. whatever a junior member or new bite can contribute are often remarkable and responding helpful. It brings out the best of the bugger the A- listers. even the newbites and junior members have their part. It gives us buggers either emotionally or virtual
    information that will let a new bite know there not alone. More importantly it helps everyone in this unpricless communit.

  52. bedbugsuptown

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    Yes, and single PMPs would be
    Much in demand. As I noted a long time ago, I think a lot of single bedbuggers dream of hooking up with a PMP who is licensed to eliminate all future bed bug issues.

    It's almost the weekend and time for a little traumatic insemination -
    David

    Talk about knights on white horses.


    Interesting thought. Did I also read between the lines that Mr David Cain is single?

    David, do u prefer arm candy or do u have a fondness for slightly older/grood lookersand sophisticated partners? Just curious. Are you aware that your weekend plans echo the novelette-the "Story of O" (to a degree anyway.)

  53. bedbugsuptown

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    Sat Dec 3 2011 0:59:52
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    another typo I meant good-lookers--you need not google this.

  54. soretit

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    Sat Dec 3 2011 8:10:04
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    Hey, BBupsidedownandallaround.Lol.
    Sorry for being Awol.
    I gotta read ALL THESE POSTS since I last looked.
    Phew!.
    I have got to go to a studio and am franticaly doing ten things at once.
    I dont have six appendages but I will be back.
    I have been having a session with Chicagoway so havent really looked around.
    I wish I had your energy and I am very pleased to hear you a lady with such a nice name.
    Get back to you all later.

    Now which hat shall I wear?
    Oh yeah. I havent got any.
    Silly me.

  55. bedbugsuptown

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    Sat Dec 3 2011 10:45:25
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    Phew, really glad soretit does not have six appendages. Is there a consensus that soretit may be
    crazy as a bedbug/minus the six legs. Surely soretit is not "mad as a hatter", poor kid doesn't even own a hat. Probably tied them in a plastic bag and disposed of them

    But what about this bit about a session with Chicagoway? is soretit some kinda saint. Like Padre Pio.
    Does soretit have the gift of bi-location? Now that would be something to be ThAnkFULL and HaPpY
    about...from the American point of view.

  56. soretit

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    Sun Dec 4 2011 8:26:54
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    Hiya kiddo.
    Actually I need a hat.
    I look like a Hare Krishna devotee and boy do you feel the cold with no hair up there.

    Guess some folks think there's not much of anything in my head and they would be right.
    I stupidly stuck my head in the Microwave so I'm running on empty at the moment.
    Nothing but some fried BBs rattling around inside my skull.
    At least they're dead.
    So it was worth the sacrifice of a few (very few) brain cells.

    Well no BBs for the third night in a row.
    I am going to let my hair grow back and sheesh, shaving bits is a real delicate operation.
    Talk about holding your future in your hands.
    Well for Guys at least.

    This whole experience has made me see a lot of things in a whole new perspective.
    Stubble on your chin, No problem.
    Stubble elsewhere. Ouch!

    Chicagoway is the saint. Not me.
    Lol.
    Saints are a soccer team from Southhampton!
    Mother Teresa, thats an extremely, extremely good person.
    But I get your drift and its positive.
    The people running this are pretty commendable too, in my humble opinion.

    You know, I feel pretty silly at the moment.
    I hadnt come across such a thing as a buttplug before Mr Caine mentioned it.
    I and I couldnt work out that he was serious about setting up the website.
    So curiosity made me google 'buttplugs' and "Jumping Jehosaphat Cor blimey mother O'Reilly" it was an eye opener.
    I thought RIM made posh mobile phones.
    And all the rest of it. Lol.

    This site is an very educational!

    And Bi-location is good. I'm good with that concept.
    Might help me find my glasses when I lose them fifty times a day.
    Anyone know if bedbugs move objects to further unsettle their victims?

    Right.
    Got routines to follow and so on.
    Y'awll stay safe out their. Pardner.

    (John Wayne beat us to the Butt Plug patent.)

  57. bedbugsuptown

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    Sat Dec 10 2011 1:27:22
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    Was that in his last years? I doubt very much that Clint Eastwood would have anything to do with anything like a butt plug. Think I'm wrong? Gwon--make my day.

  58. theyareoutthere

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    Thu Nov 29 2012 22:27:50
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    I know I'm not supposed to bump old threads. Im going to go find a blackboard and write it 200 times.

  59. bedbugsuptown

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    Thu Nov 29 2012 23:48:57
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    OMG outthere you went to Catholic School? Just say 3 Hail Mary's and an Our Father. Easy Peasy.
    Any ways.....there's a lot to say about humor. Don't think It'll add much mileage but one never knows

  60. theyareoutthere

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    Fri Nov 30 2012 6:17:54
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    Bb uptown...yes I did...used to get whapped on the knuckles quite a bit. Im not catholic...but I met some really, really great friends at the school.

  61. bed-bugscouk

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    Fri Nov 30 2012 6:25:12
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    I say its a valid bump but I am now curious as to the current status of the "love nests" that were discussed earlier. I did not see our host sporting a new hat last time I saw her!

    I have also added a few new things to BBBP but comas is still not one of them.

    David

  62. theyareoutthere

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    Nobugsonme - 12 months ago  » 

    bed-bugscouk - 31 minutes ago  » 

    Nobugsonme - 2 minutes ago  » 
    I for one am glad bedbugsuptown and soretit have found one another.

    i
    Is that because you want to shop for a new hat?
    Do we need a lonely hearts section on the site?
    I already have a suitable wedding present or two picked out, LOL.
    David

    Yes, and single PMPs would be
    Much in demand. As I noted a long time ago, I think a lot of single bedbuggers dream of hooking up with a PMP who is licensed to eliminate all future bed bug issues.
    Talk about knights on white horses.

    I think there are some married women who fantasize and probably males from 8 to 80 fantasize about the very educated, professionfl female entomologist from Italy.

  63. bed-bugscouk

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    theyareoutthere - 4 minutes ago  » 
    I think there are some married women who fantasize and probably males from 8 to 80 fantasize about the very educated, professionfl female entomologist from Italy.

    Sorry folks I stalk her on Facebook and she has a boy friend (and its not me) although I am currently seeing an Italian girl.

    David

  64. theyareoutthere

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    I don't think I'm going to be able to eat today...just slut up my coffee reading about the rental option.

    David...you've seen nobugs? I used to think you two should hook up...she appears to be one if the few women with a chance of taming you..

  65. bed-bugscouk

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    TAOT,

    Did you miss me declaring full house on bedbug bingo a few years ago, tut tut.

    I think she knows it will take an army of women to tame me and yes a few have tried on occasions.

    I am glad you enjoyed the site, I hear through the grape vine a few are upset that they may be the target of my humour on this occasions but I am still contesting that any similarities between real and fictional entomologists is only in the readers mind, I mean after all who would really be that silly as to promote something that does not work.

    David

  66. theyareoutthere

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    David..

    I don't know who would...maybe the cosmetic companies selling wrinkle creams? We aren't that far off from snake oil and the wild wild west.

    Will you still respect ne if I tell you I have a bb seat covere?

  67. bed-bugscouk

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    Fri Nov 30 2012 11:35:28
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    TOAT,

    theyareoutthere - 3 hours ago  » 
    Will you still respect ne if I tell you I have a bb seat covere?

    Not if you use it for the purpose it was allegedly designed for.

    Alternative effective uses are acceptable.

    Sorry I am just hardline with such things.

    David

  68. bedbugsuptown

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    nobugs has a fine but very hard line on this forum David.

    Don't mean to sound like some kinda whistle blower, ya' know?

    The Italian's a woman, well that sucks; I'll just keep that other fantasy alive; that clever poster, so sage,
    with a dry sense of humor--I'm just a good ole (Stones) Factory Girl.

  69. Nobugsonme

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    theyareoutthere - 1 day ago  » 
    I don't think I'm going to be able to eat today...just slut up my coffee reading about the rental option.

    If you're going to "slut up" your coffee, I am glad it's in a thread flagged as "adult."

    Seriously. Thanks for reviving this one. Delightful to revisit!

  70. Nobugsonme

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    Uptown,

    Like David, I want to know what happened to you and soretit? You seemed quite well matched verbally at least, and in my experience that's a good place to start. Like David, I thought we were going to get our first Bedbugger wedding. I could definitely use a new hat.

    I have long said I should open a matches page on the site.

    You know, "bed bug free landlord in Yonkers seeks bed bug-free tenant who is cautious."

    And "SF in SF seeks man with spray can and pesticide license for walks in the park, caulking, and maybe more."

  71. Nobugsonme

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    bed-bugscouk - 1 day ago  » 
    ...it will take an army of women to tame me...

    There's a visual!

    I'm picturing an army of women chasing after David...

  72. bedbugsuptown

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    Nobugs, copy, this is the only thread I'll be trampin' round in.

    Yeah, me and sortit, a lid for every pot--thank's for educating me. Never heard that one. I expect he's out there doin' his thing--music. A few pm's passed between us. He went to Detroit late last fall, said he'd pm me if he came to nyc but -sob- haven't heard a thing.

    A bedbugger wedding, hmm. In regards to the occasionally provocative Mr. Caine, I don't know why he hasn't come along to sweep me off my feet and make an honest women of me. After suggesting he have one of his crew feed the bug colony for awhile, him being tuckered out and feelin' over extended tired I mean.

    He posted back that he's tried but his crew refuses. I told that man that I'd not be afraid to let a bug feed on me once in awhile. I don't think David appreciates my type, a good ole girl. Traumatic insemination, hog wash.

    I think a bugger match.com would be great-- we've been there and back again. It's like after 9/11. Alot a funerals but people started taking life decisions more serious for awhile. And the baby boom after WWII. Well we buggers fought the good fight. [b]Anything for comic relief....

    It's good to be back home here!


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