Will home ever feel like home again??(6 posts)
Last weekend, I woke up to what looked like mosquito bites all around my elbow. The nurses at my job said it looked like an allergic reaction, so I didn't think too much into it but boy they itched like crazy. The following morning, I woke up to the "3 line" bite mark on my right thigh. I remembered months ago, seeing something on the news about the bedbug epidemic, and how the 3 bite line was a sure way of knowing it was bed bugs. So I googled it, compared my bites to other pictures and I called my landlord. When he finally called me back, I asked if anyone else in the building (quadplex) was complaining of itching. I told him about what I saw on the internet and said that I thought I might have bedbugs. It wasn't until then that he told me that the girl who just moved out in January had them. Then I remembered seeing her mattress up against the side of the building for weeks, I never thought anything of it before. I thought she just didn't want it anymore. Then I also remembered she left a baby crib by the dumpster at the back of the building.. less than a foot away from my bedroom window. (I live in the basement) I freaked out immediately. I was mad as hell that he didn't tell me she had them to begin with. I could have bought mattress covers, I could have prepared better for this. This could have been prevented. It was last Tuesday that he told me that she had them.
I didn't see anything, I looked high and low with a flashlight because I felt like people were calling me crazy. He insisted that he had her apartment treated and that they were gone, and kept asking if I was sure that's what the bites were. I was so frustrated because I didn't have proof, besides the welts on my arms and legs. He called the exterminator and he came out on Friday. The night before the extermination, I found two itty bitty baby bedbugs. The first was moving across the foot of my bed. Smaller than a flea, I wouldn't have seen it if it wasn't moving. I snagged it with a piece of tape, and fried it to death with my hair dryer. The following morning (the day of extermination) I found another baby bedbug, on my pillow! Right after I had lifted my head from it. Again, I snagged and fried it. I saved the piece of tape for him to look at, to prove that I wasn't crazy. I kept asking the exterminator questions, trying to understand just how bad it was, but he was a real asshole and made me feel like I was bugging him. I asked one guy from the extermination place how to prepare for the spraying. He was really vague, he just said to put my clothes into bags and into the middle of my livingroom. He didn't tell me I'd have to empty my closets, completely strip my room and bring all my belongings into the livingroom. It wasn't until the night before treatment that a different guy brought me a list of how to prepare. I had to study for midterms the following day, so I was able to get quite a bit done, but I wasn't able to wash/dry SEVEN garbage bags full of clothes and linen. So I bagged them anyway, and put them in the livingroom.
When I finally came back to my apartment Friday evening, I could smell the spray in my bedroom, but in no other room. I don't think he even touched the rest of my apartment. So basically, he had me bring all of my belongings from my bedroom into the livingroom, but didn't spray the livingroom. So I can't help but to feel like that's just going to make the bugs relocate to a different room in my place. I stayed the entire weekend at my boyfriends. (showered before I went, clean change of clothes and left my shoes at the door, no purse or overnight bag) I guess they're coming back in 10 days to spray again. Hopefully they'll do the rest of my apartment this time! I went to Walmart and bought some plastic bins to put my laundry in. I've been drying my clothes all day (the ones that were already clean) on high heat, folding them and immediately putting them in the bins.
I forgot to mention that my job won't let me return to work until they are gone. (I work at a nursing home) They asked me to take a family medical leave without pay. I broke down to my landlord and was crying because now I'm going two weeks without pay and also not to mention the cost of washing/drying clothes (coin laundry) He handed me $20 for the laundry and said he will work with me on the rent.
I just wonder if life will ever go back to normal. I don't take my purse anywhere because I'm afraid that I'll be taking hitch hikers. And since I lived with these things for one week, waking up to bites without seeing what was biting me, I can't help but to feel like they are still here, even if they did spray. I am always itching and looking, then I see nothing. I feel like I'm going crazy. When I'm out in public, I'm always looking at my skin and clothes, afraid that I'll see a bug crawling on me.
Tonight is the first night that I'll have to sleep at home tonight. (I have class in the morning) and I am dreading it. I know I won't be able to sleep. I keep my bedroom door closed at all times now, it used to be my quiet place to relax, but now I hate going in there. This doesn't feel at all like home to me anymore, and I hate coming home. My lease is up in July, and I doubt I'll ever unpack my clothes from the plastic bins back into my dressers and closets. I think I'll just live out of bins for the next several months, and move to a new place when my lease is up. (and buy a new mattress!) Thank God I didn't have any livingroom furniture. That would just be more that I would have to replace.
Sorry for the long ass vent! I'm just so stressed out
Oh and another thing, my step mom has some food grade DE that she said I can have. But the exterminator was adamant that I shouldn't use that, he said I would "mess his whole thing up". I wouldn't doubt that he is just money hungry and wants to have a little bit of job security, and that's why he doesn't want me to take any steps of treating it myself. Afterall, he supposedly treated the other girls apartment, but clearly the job wasn't effective. Also, from my understanding, there is STILL a couch up there in her apartment that is probably crawling with them. My landlord says he can't go in there (even though she moved out at the end of January) it makes no sense to me. He doesn't think that couch is infested just because they sprayed.
As I was reading your post I had to keep stopping and asking myself if I was accidentally reading one of my own! I feel urged to recite the traditional response:, "hang in there it will get better, sorry you are going through this, etc. But I feel like it loses it's meaning when said over and over, it gets to being too scripted. However,I really am sorry you are going through this and feel your anger. How angry I would be living in a place where no one told me something like that and then the infested junk was just disposed of so carelessly?? You could sue for negligence, or would think you could anyway, but unless you had photos of the trash outside ur window and such I guess it wouldn't hold up in court.
It seems like a good thing that your landlord slipped you a couple bucks for laundry, maybe that means they actually feel bad or they are just trying to cover their ass. Really feeling sorry for people who live in apartments. The area in which I live has SO MANY apartment complexes! There are areas where it's just one after another along the road. There is one a couple minutes from here and one day while driving by I was looking at the dumpster. Nothing but sofas, love seats, etc. It's so sad and scary!
The day before my first treatment that is what happened too, but I found two babies but both were on my pillow! Had assumed my bedroom was clear up to that point.
I asked this same question on this very forum last year and I was positive that it would NOT EVER feel like home again, but it does.
I am still making my way to the finish line as far as feeling like it's home again. I am not saying I don't feel like it's home because I do but I still have not unpacked all my clothes and still have my days that come and go as far as feeling uneasy. Those days are getting few and far between though
I think what I'm trying to say is that bed bugs are still in the back of my mind and that will be something that I'll have to work on with time and perhaps and new place and new furniture one day will make it seem like it was a million years ago!
Drive by post as I need to get to work, but:
If you haven't read the FAQ on DE, you should.
DE can be a major inhalation hazard, and PMP's are concerned about their own health as we are. Improperly applied DE can actually weaken the effectiveness of the professional treatment, and there are plenty of good PCOs who would refuse to treat a residence if DE has been applied. Without knowing your whole story, I'd give the professional treatments a chance to work before I went out and got the necessary personal protective equivalent needed to apply DE safely and risk having PCOs not treat my place. That means waiting for the full course of treatments from the PMP before trying to self-treat.
In addition, yes--home will feel like home again. It's hard to believe, but it will happen once you're bug free long enough.
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