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What do you do to stay positive??
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WeCanWin
newbite
Joined: May '09
Posts: 20
Posted 6 months ago
Mon May 18 2009 21:21:40
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I laugh at myself A LOT. This has helped me cope with a lot of situations in my life that have been beyond my control. After I calm down, cry my eyes out, feel sorry for myself and get angry, I always end up laughing. Why? Because I cannot control what is happening to me, but I CAN control how I deal with it.
This experience (which is ongoing) has taught me a lot to appreciate everything and everyone in my life. As I mentioned in my earlier posts, I suffer from depression. I think this bed bug nightmare has actually helped cure my depression. It really puts your life in perspective. I think back to the last two years and how much I complained about stuff that did not matter. How much I cried and felt sorry for myself for things that I COULD CHANGE but was too lazy, too depressed, too broken down to deal with. I now realize that those setbacks were nothing compared to what is happening now.
With time, this bud beg infestation will pass. My parents will have their house back and life will go on. They are getting older and need my help- and that is what I have to do right now. I am getting stronger every day and I know that I can deal with problems now with a little more grace and a tougher skin.
Why do I laugh at myself? Oh, because I've done some pretty dumb stuff since the whole bb nightmare began. Here are just a few:
1. I was plugging in my laptop behind the couch and my ENTIRE arm (up to the shoulder blade got stuck between the couch and the wall. I was stuck for 10 minutes. Every time I tried to wiggle my arm out it kept getting sucked in further! When I finally got it out, I had bruises all over my arm. My dad sat helpless in the next room because he couldn't walk (this happened the day after his fall). I'm just glad that I got it out and we didn't have to call for outside help!
2. Day 3 after infestation discovery I pooped in my pants. I have never done that before. First time for everything, I guess. I had the runs for a week (sorry, I know it's gross).
3. Day 2 after the infestation discovery/ dad's fall- I had to go back to the doctor's to get my dad a foot splint (apparently the doc gave us the wrong one). I had not slept in 36 hours. The ride should have only taken 15 minutes, but because I was sleep deprived, panicky and anxious it ended up taking 2 hours to get there. I stopped for directions 3x and still couldn't find it. I cried a lot during that ride. It was cathartic. By the time I got back to my dad at home, I was calm and collected:)
4. My dad used to have a routine before he fell (he fell the night before the first treatment while helping me get the mattress downstairs)! He is stubborn and I've had to educate him A LOT about the bed bug problem. I feel bad that he is under house arrest, but I can't risk him falling and breaking something (like his hip). His road to recovery is already long enough as it is... Anyway, he is finally walking around a little with the help of crutches. Yesterday he snuck into the garage where I have kept all the garbage bags filled with things to throw away. He really wanted to salvage a $50 modem and decided to open all of the garbage bags. He probably tracked some bugs/eggs back in the house. I did not laugh, but went for a ride to calm myself down. I can laugh about it now, but only because without a sense of humor I probably would have burned the house down by now.
The list continues...
Thanks for reading!
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