Got Bed Bugs? Bedbugger Forums » Tales of Bed Bug Woe
The Good Things About Having Bed Bugs
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cmk4868
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Joined: Jul '09
Posts: 26
Posted 3 months ago
Thu Jul 30 2009 13:13:10
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10 Best Things About Having NYC Bed Bugs
10) Great way to test your landlord’s character – “those are mosquito bite… maybe you have fleas… get that rash checked by a dermatologist… I’m sure the people next door to you are fine… my cousin Walter has some gas he can use to fix things up…”
09) Develops a Sense of “24”-like Urgency about everyday life as you wait for PCO visit – “must get everything washed by tomorrow morning, then all books need to be bagged by noon, must get all furniture moved away by two, stand up mattress and get Ziploc bags by three..”
08) Discourages Materialism – “maybe we aren’t really meant to own things like clothing, beds, books, and electronic devices…”
07) Reduces Clutter – like a mandatory and really radical spring cleaning! And you can rediscover the aesthetic design pleasure of redecorating with folding chairs and plastic lawn tables!
06) Fun With Dry Cleaners! – “hi, my clothing may have bed bugs. Do you mind if I drop some stuff off – just be extra careful with it and the odds are pretty good that you probably won’t get bitten, infest your own home, or shop, or other customers clothes…Hello? Anyone there? Hm, wonder why he hung up!”
05) See How Important being Green and a PETA member Really is to you! – “Yes, I need to kill all of the little S.O.B.s: nothing but PERC on my clothing please, let’s bring back DDT, and do they sell small neutron bombs for home use?”
04) Great Way to Avoid Awkward Social Entanglements! – “sorry, can’t make that party, have to prep for the next pest control visit!”, “Love to see you and Ralph, but hey, I might track some eggs over to your house, so some other time – maybe in a few months!”, “Sorry, Trixie, I’m afraid I can’t see you anymore – I’m infested with parasitic vermin!”
03) Fun With Dry Cleaners Part II – “Great, you will take my clothing that might have bed bugs?! How much? Oh. $37 for a suit, $21 per pair of pants…. I see. Um, that’s more than triple normal dry cleaning rates… And then there’s also a materials and handling surcharge? Oh, sure, of course, it’s not like I haven’t already lost a third of my belongings, and spent $2,000 on ineffective treatments so far. Maybe I can get by with only one suit and two shirts for work after all…”
02) The Many Beneficial Effects of Sleep Deprivation – “ Can you make that a triple redeye? And two pieces of the Dexedrine Sugar Fruit Loaf please! Wait, what’s that itching I feel…Another bite? A reaction to the insecticides I bathe in before going to bed? Psychosis?”
01) Helps You Develop New Interests and Vocabulary – “what sort of residual will you use on my crevices?” “Do you carry food quality Diacetylsynchronouscontumaceous Earth in your pet store”? “Let me tell you about my research on neem oil…”
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lil_bit_obsessed
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Joined: Dec '07
Posts: 495
Posted 3 months ago
Thu Jul 30 2009 13:26:51
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hahahahahahahahahha.
especially 7 and 8. so true. i actually purchase furniture now based on whether or not i think it would be easy to inspect in the event of another infestation.
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buggedinthenight
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Joined: Jul '09
Posts: 5
Posted 3 months ago
Fri Jul 31 2009 7:20:25
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ha! awesome.
I especially relate to #8. We've probably purged 1/2 of what we owned at this point. I'm wrestling with the books at this point. I love them so. Is it worth buying a pac-tite? I'm thinking it might be. My non-materialism has reached its known limits.
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stricken
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Joined: Jun '09
Posts: 75
Posted 3 months ago
Fri Jul 31 2009 7:34:50
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I am glad I bought mine. While it may be enabling me to hold onto some possessions I'd be better off chucking, I don't want to chuck things in a panic, so I'm throwing out what I can and baking the rest. Also, if I'd had the Packtite before sending all my stuff to the dry cleaners, it would have paid for itself by now given that I'm spending about the same on dry cleaning as I have on buying the Packtite. In addition, given the spread of bb's, we may very well get them again, so a Packtite is good to have on hand. In other words, I consider it an investment.
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Aris
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Joined: Apr '08
Posts: 62
Posted 3 months ago
Fri Jul 31 2009 11:03:35
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HILARIOUS.
And all of it so true.
I was just considering how the experience makes you look at household purchases differently forever after. (Do I really need that xxxx? Probably not.) -
your host
Joined: Mar '07
Posts: 5,547
Posted 3 months ago
Fri Jul 31 2009 11:06:23
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Sad, but true and very well-said. You have to laugh a bit to get through all this.
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Adele
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Joined: May '08
Posts: 556
Posted 3 months ago
Fri Jul 31 2009 12:21:47
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this is hilarious - thanks for posting it - and very well written
I am sure on the afflicted could relate - but it's good to bring in the funny once in a while
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death2allbbs
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Joined: Jul '08
Posts: 158
Posted 3 months ago
Fri Jul 31 2009 17:12:00
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LOL Those are pretty good, cmk4868. I especially liked you 09) since I tend to be a last minute kind of a person.
And I also liked your 07) since I can have a tendency to allow clutter to accumulate. Although fortunately, I never did experience the "folding chairs and plastic lawn tables" part.
Also, your 03) is kind of true. Where I live, they actually have a Dry Cleaners that has bed bug pick up service....which of course adds to the cost of their service.
And in your 02) when you had mentioned bathing in insecticides, that has always made me wonder about all the furniture that we had to/have to sit in and sleep on which has been saturated with pesticide. ...Yuck! :(
And you are right about the new vocabulary in your 01). I'll never forget how proud I felt being able to pronounce Diacetylsynchronouscontumaceous Earth. ;)
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buggyinsocal
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Joined: Jun '08
Posts: 1,129
Posted 3 months ago
Fri Jul 31 2009 17:36:41
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While we're on the subject of humor, I thought I'd point out that I am once again able to eat things with flax seeds in them without freaking out.
It only took a year and a month before that happened. Positively rapid improvement I tell you.
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lil_bit_obsessed
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Joined: Dec '07
Posts: 495
Posted 3 months ago
Fri Jul 31 2009 23:06:39
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buggy - lol.
certain bagels still weird me out, depending on the seed topping.
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ThisSucksButWillWin
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Joined: Jul '09
Posts: 6
Posted 3 months ago
Fri Jul 31 2009 23:50:16
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How about my laptop? Could they be in the keyboard?
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buggedinthenight
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Joined: Jul '09
Posts: 5
Posted 3 months ago
Sat Aug 1 2009 7:53:44
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ThisSucksButWillWin - 7 hours ago »
How about my laptop? Could they be in the keyboard?Yes. I discovered that my laptop had a pregnant female (I assume) and some eggs in the keyboard, after I got bit while sitting there typing. I blew the eggs out with canned air and sucked the female out with a vacuum with the finest attachment. My PCO suggested putting the whole thing in a bag with a DDVP strip just to be certain it's clean. Meanwhile, I've gotten another laptop, put it in another location, and I keep it stored away when I'm not using it.
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ThisSucksButWillWin
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Joined: Jul '09
Posts: 6
Posted 3 months ago
Sun Aug 2 2009 11:18:20
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What you say is probably true, it's just so insane how careful we must be. I am moving a bed and chair straight from ikea today and spent half hour inspecting my clothes this am before heading to new place. Am I doing a good job? Everything is getting thown out or burnwashed and burn dried, or if posible closely inspected. How reliable is an visual inspection of things like , say... My nasty new balance sneakers. Should I take them off before entering and buy some flip flops for my new place. Hey just came up with that idea!
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surrounded
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Joined: Sep '08
Posts: 75
Posted 3 months ago
Sun Aug 2 2009 15:40:03
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I can really relate to #9. I have become a pro at decon under duress. got a bite in my office chair? no problem, get steamer over here in 20 minutes, chair disssasembled and scorched in 10 minutes, seal clothes i was wearing in plastic, seal steamer in plastic, put office area on containment strategy for the next two months, put clothes and purse in packtite, all in time for lunch.
i have some temp roommates at my new apt, and they have been marveling at my constant activity and merciless efficiency. if i have a spare hour, its time to run the bedding thru the wash and check all the monitors! -
DeathToAllBBs
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Joined: Aug '09
Posts: 55
Posted 2 months ago
Tue Sep 1 2009 0:37:48
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cmk4868 - 1 month ago »
10 Best Things About Having NYC Bed Bugs
10) Great way to test your landlord’s character – “those are mosquito bite… maybe you have fleas… get that rash checked by a dermatologist… I’m sure the people next door to you are fine… my cousin Walter has some gas he can use to fix things up…”
09) Develops a Sense of “24”-like Urgency about everyday life as you wait for PCO visit – “must get everything washed by tomorrow morning, then all books need to be bagged by noon, must get all furniture moved away by two, stand up mattress and get Ziploc bags by three..”
08) Discourages Materialism – “maybe we aren’t really meant to own things like clothing, beds, books, and electronic devices…”
07) Reduces Clutter – like a mandatory and really radical spring cleaning! And you can rediscover the aesthetic design pleasure of redecorating with folding chairs and plastic lawn tables!
06) Fun With Dry Cleaners! – “hi, my clothing may have bed bugs. Do you mind if I drop some stuff off – just be extra careful with it and the odds are pretty good that you probably won’t get bitten, infest your own home, or shop, or other customers clothes…Hello? Anyone there? Hm, wonder why he hung up!”
05) See How Important being Green and a PETA member Really is to you! – “Yes, I need to kill all of the little S.O.B.s: nothing but PERC on my clothing please, let’s bring back DDT, and do they sell small neutron bombs for home use?”
04) Great Way to Avoid Awkward Social Entanglements! – “sorry, can’t make that party, have to prep for the next pest control visit!”, “Love to see you and Ralph, but hey, I might track some eggs over to your house, so some other time – maybe in a few months!”, “Sorry, Trixie, I’m afraid I can’t see you anymore – I’m infested with parasitic vermin!”
03) Fun With Dry Cleaners Part II – “Great, you will take my clothing that might have bed bugs?! How much? Oh. $37 for a suit, $21 per pair of pants…. I see. Um, that’s more than triple normal dry cleaning rates… And then there’s also a materials and handling surcharge? Oh, sure, of course, it’s not like I haven’t already lost a third of my belongings, and spent $2,000 on ineffective treatments so far. Maybe I can get by with only one suit and two shirts for work after all…”
02) The Many Beneficial Effects of Sleep Deprivation – “ Can you make that a triple redeye? And two pieces of the Dexedrine Sugar Fruit Loaf please! Wait, what’s that itching I feel…Another bite? A reaction to the insecticides I bathe in before going to bed? Psychosis?”
01) Helps You Develop New Interests and Vocabulary – “what sort of residual will you use on my crevices?” “Do you carry food quality Diacetylsynchronouscontumaceous Earth in your pet store”? “Let me tell you about my research on neem oil…”Thank you for this!!! I laughed over BBs for the first time since .... ever!
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SleeplessInVan
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Joined: Aug '09
Posts: 14
Posted 2 months ago
Tue Sep 1 2009 1:01:59
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Oh god I needed that laugh. I've had a hell of a day.
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DistressInBrooklyn
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Joined: Aug '09
Posts: 35
Posted 2 months ago
Tue Sep 1 2009 18:56:11
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OMG. buggyinsocal, lil bit:
i REFUSE to buy what used to be my favorite multigrain bread because of the seeds! hahahahahhaha
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Joined: Sep '09
Posts: 46
Posted 2 months ago
Thu Sep 3 2009 23:49:22
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lil_bit_obsessed - 1 month ago »
hahahahahahahahahha.
especially 7 and 8. so true. i actually purchase furniture now based on whether or not i think it would be easy to inspect in the event of another infestation.I spent four hours on the Ikea site today budgeting my new desk, chair and bed....
....all with metal framing, no wood.
....all have plastic in place of wood where metal cannot go.
....I'm refusing rugs//carpeting//curtains//any material dangling anywhere. I think it will become very Zen ;p
Cinderblock bunkers, anyone?
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