Got Bed Bugs? Bedbugger Forums » Psychological and Health problems caused by bed bugs (besides bites)
Diary of a Mad Bedbugger...
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tormentedbybbs
newbite
Joined: Feb '10
Posts: 37
Posted 1 month ago
Mon Feb 8 2010 0:06:03
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Notwithstanding my valiant attempt to forget about bbs and enjoy myself for a few precious hours today, my neurosis and paranoia made this nearly impossible. I was going to visit a friend - something I've refrained from doing since I learned about the bbs- I haven't even seen my freaking granddaughter, because I am absolutely terrified of infesting my daughter's apartment - I'm afraid if I'm anywhere NEAR either of them the bbs will somehow find a way onto them and then it's all over....Anyway, first I put every item of clothing in the dryer, including my sneakers - which actually shrunk, and smelled like they were burning. I was actually happy about this, fantasizing about bbs in/on the shoes, their bodies crumbling to dust...I even tried to put my bag - with it's entire contents into the dryer. I first placed it in a lingerie bag, and would have kept it in there - but then I realized that I might melt something important, so I just ended up taking out my $, the house key, and my debit card. BB's REALLY help you make a fashion statement - austere... I dried my clothing for nearly 45 minutes, my coat and scarf, everything. Put my clothes on in the bathroom, rolling the pants legs up so they wouldn't touch the floor. Then I put my shoes and coat outside on the front porch right from the dryer, and put that stuff on outside - so who the F cares if its in the teens, that's price you pay for having stupid bbs. Then I had to get on the bus...OMFG, I nearly hyperventilated and didn't go. I realized bbs might actually be lurking on the bus seat, waiting to re-infest my completely nuked and utterly pure coat and pants (now, of COURSE, I've been on the bus before, and didn't even THINK about it, but today I was absolutely sure they were there just waiting for me...Somehow, I stayed on the bus, and made it to Port Authority (NYC). I went into the rest room, and as I took my coat off, looked at the floor - and saw a black speck! My heart was in my mouth, my head was pounding - oh, no - after all that careful planning I had brought one with me, I can't go to my friend's now, what am I going to do, blah blah blah etc etc etc. In the rest room at Port Authority, probably one of the filthiest, highest traffic areas of the country - maybe the world, I licked my finger and made direct contact witht the ground - so I could pick up the speck, duh, and seek what stage of a bb it was....Then I realized, I had left my glasses in my bag. OH NO. But the speck didn't feel like a bb - I have had touched them before. It was flat, and that's when it crumbled in my hand, like any piece of DIRT probably would have....sigh....Freaked out beyond belief, and now grossed out and repulsed that I had actually touched the floor of Port Authority (but, of course, no where NEAR as repulsed and grossed out as I was by the bbs), made my way to my friend's apartment. I got there, and then panic set in - OMG, where do I put my coat??? Then I actually spent at least an hour talking and almost forgetting about bbs...ALMOST, that it, until I started feeling myself being bit, and went to the bathroom in a complete panic to check...only to find NOTHING. The "biting" sensation went on, and my next trip to the bathroom, there was yet another infamous black speck, right on the floor...picked this one up too, in order to inspect. Did not think it felt like a bb. Tried to calmly eat dinner. Put my hand down on the couch, and felt what any NORMAL person would have thought was sand or something similar that was tiny and hard - to me, it was - OMFG - bbs, can they be this small, maybe they're babies, OMG, where did they come from, my shirt, OMG....I picked them up, but they were impossible to see. but didn't appear to be bbs. I through them down the drain. I left, and then had to get BACK on the bus again - that's when I almost lost it. I NEVER cry, EVER. I just was so freaking exhausted from all this anxiety, I almost started sobbing right on the bus. I got home, and my housemates had stripped the drapes from all the windows as part of the PCO prep. When I asked if they had bagged, etc, they were like "the whole house is infested, what the fuck is the difference" etc etc - and they are right. They love me, and have tried to not show it, but they are VERY angry that I've brought this plague upon their house - we are SO out of $$ and may not even be able to afford the bed encasements at the end of treatment, so this $$ issue just adds to the stress. Got to my room, and was just numb. Nothing, nada, no emotion, dead. Crying would be SO helpful right now....
Sorry for the long rant, and noone may read it, but I just had to get it out. Thanks again for providing this forum, without which I would feel even MORE isolated and hopeless.
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wchicago
junior member
Joined: Oct '09
Posts: 249
Posted 1 month ago
Mon Feb 8 2010 1:11:56
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oh wow tormented, i'm so sorry. i completely sympathize (and couldn't help but chuckle about your bed bug fashion statement - "austere" -very funny)
i hope the PCO treatment goes smoothly and you'll soon be tormented no more. hang in there. -
bait
senior member
Joined: Jul '08
Posts: 520
Posted 1 month ago
Mon Feb 8 2010 6:52:07
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Tormented,
Not a bad read. Not a bad idea either, keeping a diary. Probaby therapeutic.
Hope you're helping your awesome housemates with some of that prep work. Some people report doing the work as a type of therapy as well.
The worst part of this whole ordeal is the potential to spread an infestation. This has unfortunately happened to you. You sound like a pretty together person and are able to cope with that stress. And of course you are doing everything possible to minimize the possibility of it ever happening again.
Good luck to you and your friends.
Bait
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tormentedbybbs
newbite
Joined: Feb '10
Posts: 37
Posted 1 month ago
Mon Feb 8 2010 9:10:56
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Wchicago: Thanks for your comment, and well wishes. (Have you delved into "bb austere couture" as well?) - I'm also praying, wishing, hoping the PCO can be successful. Due to the nature of these little beasts, I am SO worried they/we will miss one...then it's back to square one! Arghhhhh! I hope you've been able to solve your problem, as well.
Bait: The fact that, after reading my irrational rant, you took from it that I am "together" - OMFG!!! Considering this is the MOST not-together I've ever been in my life, that remark made me smile - a completely RARE occurrence these days...so thanks! As for my housemates, they are the MOST awesome, ITA. I have told them repeatedly that I will do ALL of the prep work - but, since it's their house, they keep just doing it, and I come home to pictures down from the walls, drapes down, etc. I have begged them to let me do all the drying, etc, and that's probably going to be my project this week - at least that's my plan, including complete vacuuming of every single surface in the house. Anyway, thanks again, and good luck to you in your bb eradication efforts.
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