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Let’s get into that holiday spirit

There’s nothing worse than bed bugs during the holidays. But we still have to celebrate life, family, and love. Toss in a litte gallows humor (so beloved of Bedbuggers) and you have Bed Bug Holiday Songs:

NotSoSnug has started us off, messaging me with his Christmas carol to the tune of “Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire”:

Clothing drying in a hot dryer,

Bedbugs nipping at your toes,

Woe-filled tales being sung by newbites,

And folks bagging up their winter clothes.

Everybody knows some DE and pyrethrin,

Help to stop the bed bugs bite,

Paranoid folks with their eyes all a bug

Will find it hard to sleep at night.

They know that BedBugz are on their way,

They’ve got some yummy human blood to taste today,

And every mothers child is going to say,

How did the situation get this way?

And so I’m offering the simple phrase,

To Bedbuggers from everywhere,

Although its been said many times many ways,

Merry Christmas to you.

Thanks, NotSoSnug!

If anyone else has a holiday-themed ditty, the comments below are the place to share.

I’ll start you off with a few ideas:

“Hanukkah, Oh Hannukah”:

Hanukkah, oh Hanukkah, come load up the dryer

Bake all our papers, empty the drawers

“Good King Wenceslas”:

Pyrethroid resistance came, on the Feast of Stephen

So my bed bugs bounced right back, and said “Now we are even!”

“Silent Night”:

Itchy night, scratchy night

Bed bugs came, supped all right

Welts and pustules appeared in sight

Called a PCO out

He sprayed pesticides about

“Grandpa Got Run Over by A Reindeer”

Grandma got bitten by a bed bug

Staying at the casino New Year’s Eve

I am quite sure you can do as well or better at finishing these, or starting a new one, as I can. Hannukah and Kwanzaa songs are a bit thin on the ground, so especially welcome.

Let it rip, Bedbuggers!

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RSS Feed for This Post10 Comment(s)

  1. hopelessnomo | Dec 8, 2007 | Reply

    I have no contribution, sadly, but want to applaud appreciatively. 8)

  2. James Buggles | Dec 9, 2007 | Reply

    The first Bed Bug I’m sorry to say
    Was to certain free range chickens in coops as they lay;
    In coops where they lay trying to sleep,
    With millions of bed bugs biting them deep.

  3. tony | Dec 17, 2007 | Reply

    I am so glad others maintain some humor I posted part of this before a link was put up to this one. So here’s the expanded version done to jingle bells.

    Dashing Through The Snow
    All My Clothes In Ziploc Bags
    Over The Hills We Go
    Trying To Get Away

    Bells On Bobtails Ring
    Make It Through The Night
    It’s No Fun To Laugh & Sing
    When The Bed Bugs Bite Tonight

    Oh Jingle Bells Jingle Bells
    They’re crawling up your leg
    You don’t feel them even when they bite
    You wished they’d go away hey

    Jingle Bells Jingle Bells
    They drive you near insane
    You know their there
    You’ve got their bites
    And they haven’t gone away hey

    Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all. My New years Wish is for these critters to leave us all and go bother someone else for awhile (a long while).

  4. nyjammin | Dec 17, 2007 | Reply

    You’d better watch out
    All you can do is cry
    You can even pout
    And I’m gonna tell you why

    Bedbugs are coming to your town
    Bedbugs are coming to your town
    Bedbugs are commiinng to your town

    They are scanning your area
    They are checking it twice
    They are gonna make sure
    That your DE doesn’t make them sliced

    Bedbugs are coming to your town
    Bedbugs are coming to your town
    Bedbugs are commiinng to your town

    They get you when you’re sleeping
    They get you when you’re awake
    They get you if you’ve been bad or good
    So, you better be bad
    And kill them for your sake

    Bedbugs are coming to your town (soon! whoa!)
    Bedbugs are coming to your town (Oh no!)
    Bedbugs are commiinng to YOUR town!

    I must be feeling better to have wrote this. Regards.

  5. tony | Dec 17, 2007 | Reply

    Thank you nyjammin I got quite the chuckle out of that and it gave me hope you were feeling a little bit more cheerful.

  6. nobugsonme | Dec 17, 2007 | Reply

    Thanks Jammin and Tony!

    That’s the spirit!!!

  7. tony | Dec 20, 2007 | Reply

    I don’t know why these keep popping into my head. It’s like I’m possesed by Wierd Al Yankovich or maybe the catholic version of him. Sung to Santa Claus Is Coming To Town:

    You Better Not Sleep
    And Leave On The Lights
    They’re Gonna Come Out
    Because It’s The Night
    Bed Bugs Are Coming To Dine

    They Know When You Are Sleeping
    They Know When Your Awake
    They Know That You Have Blood In You
    So They Dine For Goodness Sakes

    Oh

    You Better Not Sleep
    And Leave On The Lights
    They’re Gonna Come Out
    Because It’s The Night
    Bed Bugs Are Coming To Dine

  8. tony | Dec 20, 2007 | Reply

    PS - I kind of took nyjammin’s version and put my own demented twist on it.

    Hope You All Like
    What I Just Did
    Wish We Didn’t Have
    The Problems We Did

    Happy Holidays Folks!

  9. Winston O. Buggy | Dec 21, 2007 | Reply

    Chestnuts roasting on an open fire
    Bed bugs nipping at your toes
    You’ve bombed, sprayed and are tired of throwing bed bugs in the fire
    And folks may dress for sleep like Eskimos
    But the Cimex still get you in the nose
    Help to make the season bright
    Just let me sleep through the night

    Tiny tots with their eyes anemically aglow
    Will find it hard to sleep again tonight
    They’ve been bitten since last May
    Lets hope Santa packs pyrethrum on his sleigh
    And every mothers child is gonna stay
    On the newly encased mattress bought today
    And so I’m offering this simple phrase
    To bedbuggers from one to ninety two
    Although it’s been said many times, many ways
    I hope that bed bugs are finished for you

    (Somewhere the flowing melody died it must be the Cimex in the system)

  10. nobugsonme | Dec 21, 2007 | Reply

    That second stanza almost made me tear up, Winston.

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