There’s nothing worse than bed bugs during the holidays. But we still have to celebrate life, family, and love. Toss in a litte gallows humor (so beloved of Bedbuggers) and you have Bed Bug Holiday Songs:
NotSoSnug has started us off, messaging me with his Christmas carol to the tune of “Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire”:
Clothing drying in a hot dryer,
Bedbugs nipping at your toes,
Woe-filled tales being sung by newbites,
And folks bagging up their winter clothes.
Everybody knows some DE and pyrethrin,
Help to stop the bed bugs bite,
Paranoid folks with their eyes all a bug
Will find it hard to sleep at night.
They know that BedBugz are on their way,
They’ve got some yummy human blood to taste today,
And every mothers child is going to say,
How did the situation get this way?
And so I’m offering the simple phrase,
To Bedbuggers from everywhere,
Although its been said many times many ways,
Merry Christmas to you.
If anyone else has a holiday-themed ditty, the comments below are the place to share.
I’ll start you off with a few ideas:
“Hanukkah, Oh Hannukah”:
Hanukkah, oh Hanukkah, come load up the dryer
Bake all our papers, empty the drawers
“Good King Wenceslas”:
Pyrethroid resistance came, on the Feast of Stephen
So my bed bugs bounced right back, and said “Now we are even!”
Itchy night, scratchy night
Bed bugs came, supped all right
Welts and pustules appeared in sight
Called a PCO out
He sprayed pesticides about
“Grandpa Got Run Over by A Reindeer”
Grandma got bitten by a bed bug
Staying at the casino New Year’s Eve
I am quite sure you can do as well or better at finishing these, or starting a new one, as I can. Hannukah and Kwanzaa songs are a bit thin on the ground, so especially welcome.
Let it rip, Bedbuggers!